The next day came and I met him in the park. It was a beautiful day, sun striking through the leaves of the trees. Soaking up all the beam of the sun as we wondered our way aimlessly down the path.

“Hey” he shouted as he waved over at me. “I was starting to think you weren’t going to show up.” He said as I walked towards him.

From the day that I met him he had me so perplexed with just one breath, that’s how I knew I was locked in love. I was so perplexed that, its almost shocking.

“Don’t worry I’m not you.” I said.

As we walked through the park Christopher said “So I’ve waited for a while now and you haven’t told me how it went a few nights ago. You have me held in suspension. Are you going to tell me? I know I may not have had been there, but that doesn’t mean I don want to hear about it” he said prompting me to spill the details.

“It was… amazing. I got up in front of the biggest crowd I had ever been in front of. But although I was nervous and shaking before it, I was strong and confident.”

He was giving me a smile I hadn’t ever seen before.

“Why are you staring at me like that?” I asked him.

“I can imagine you up there… looking amazing as you always do. All eyes on you, but then again that isn’t anything new?” He said.

I’ll admit he made me smile saying that comment.

“I was completely new person, I wasn’t the shy girl everyone perceives me as. I had a confident voice and held everyone’s attention to the point that you could hear a pin drop! It was incredible.” I said.

As we walked around the park, strolling through it, it was as though in a way we were back to our old ways. Goofing around with one another, but I couldn’t help but need answers so I changed the subject.

“So I got to ask… a few nights ago when you said, “You always were when it came to me anyway.” I said.

“I meant with how we used to be – the laughs we would have.” Said Christopher.

“Can I ask you something else?” I asked.

“Of course.” He said.

“You work in an office right?” So it’s crossed my mind, as to why would your work have something to do with clearing your conscience? Why now that you want me back in your life? I can’t help but feel curious as to why now…” I said.

Christopher cleared his voice. I could see, he wasn’t sure exactly what to say but what came from his mouth next I wasn’t expecting it, “The thing is Delilah, I just grew the balls to finally admit I was wrong. Since our time ended I’ve done of a lot of growing up; and if I am being totally honest with you here, I have to admit I haven’t been totally honest with you.”

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“The way I treated you I didn’t expect for you to always be there for me at the end of the day. I’ll admit I felt the same way that you felt about me. I had a huge crush on you and wanted to be with you so badly it drove me insane. But how I felt I stopped myself because well… I thought I wasn’t good enough for you. So that’s why I would try to break you.”

I turned my head away with my arms folded as I thought of what to say to him. A moment later I turned my head back and looked at him.

“Why didn’t you say something to me?” I asked.

“I was scared and knew I wasn’t good enough for you.” he said.

“You should have reached out Christopher you aren’t the judge if you are good enough for a girl, they are and they will tell you. Just know that for future references. However, if your being honest then I guess I can too.” I said.

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes before I eventually exhaled.

“Back then I liked you a lot! I would have gone through with it with you. You were at the time the only guy I ever wanted… but I did truly love you. You were my first love.” I said.

The conversation I’ll admit it, it was a little awkward… a little hard to think of what to change the subject to next.

“So since you asked me questions I think its only fair I get to ask you a few in return.” He said.

“Okay” I said.

“So I’ve got to ask… is there anyone you’re interested in or with?” he asked.

“Yeah there is someone I am kind of seeing.” I said.

“Well yeah and no.” he said.

Confused I asked, “What do you mean by that? Its either you do or don’t” I said as I chuckled.

“Well its complicated.” He said as he chuckled.

“If its someone you like a lot then go for it. Its worth it, take a chance you don’t know what you could be missing let alone her with a guy like you.” I said.

“You think?” he asked.”

“Yeah! Anyway, don’t stall trying to keep the details from me,” I said as I lightly hit his arm “Tell me about her” I said encouraging him.

“Well she is drop dead gorgeous!” he said in an excited voice “ And the way she smiles oh my god she has my heart stopping. When we talk she brings this guy out in me I never knew about. When I see her no matter what she is wearing she takes my breath away. The title feature’s she hates is what has me under her spell. She has a wonderful personality. But her eyes wow, they pull me in and I see this person who I can spending my life with one day.” But then he lowered his voce in a sad tone as he said “But I guess it doesn’t matter anymore – I lost her,” he said.

Wait was that a hint? I thought to myself is he interested in me? Maybe I am overreacting, maybe I am over reading the situation – I have a tendency to do that.

“She sounds amazing Christopher! Why don’t you go get her? If you love her then tell her, life is too short not to do what makes you happy.” I said.

“ Hey there’s an ice cream stall over there, you want something?” asked Christopher as he pointed towards the stall.

“Yeah sure.” I said.

He walked over to the stall.

“ Hiya yeah, can I have one chocolate ice - cream and one strawberry ice - cream.” He asked.

He hands over the money and in return is given the cones of ice cream. As we talked to one another carrying on with our conversation he noticed something on my face.

“Wait there’s something on you.” he said as he pointed to my face.

“What? Get off get it off!” I said freaking out.

“Okay well stand still.” He said.

I stood frozen and closed as my eyes hiding from what could be an insect I’m scared of.

“Its right…. There.” He said as he took his finger and wiped a bit of his ice - cream on my nose.

I opened my eyes and found he had put this ice – cream on my nose. I smiled and gave him that look that said really?

“Christopher….” I said “Come here, give me a hug” I said as I opened my arms up and walked towards him.

“What? No!” he said as he held out his hands.

I walked closer towards him.

“I’m not kidding get away from me,” he said as he tried to push me away.

I came near him and he restrained me holding both my arms over myself. His hands holding mine as my back is to him, I suddenly found myself being held in his strong arms. He lets go of my hand and starts to hug me from my waist. His chin then rested on my shoulder. The ice – cream still on my nose I wiped it on his neck. We broke away as he wiped it off himself – I laughed at his reaction. He then pulled me in close to him again. I wanted to push him away but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. A strand of hair in my face, with a single glance he took his hand and gentle brushed it out of the way. Faces inches away, his lips pressed us against mine, and suddenly, I was hooked. My head just under his chin and once again I found myself aw-ing at his muscular chest. Shocked I didn’t know what to do let alone what to think. I pulled away quickly.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

“Christopher what are you doing?” I cried out in confusion.

“ What? Isn’t this what you’ve wanted?” he asked.

Truth is it was all I ever thought about. But I moved on and to go back to where we used to be, it wouldn’t be fair on him.

“I don’t know what I want with us. Besides I’m with someone now.” I said.

“I was a an idiot to let you go. If it means I need to spend a lot of years making it up to you – then I will. I will do that, just to prove how much you mean to me. I lost, my best friend and I’m not prepared to give up without a fight.” He said.

“ I was fine before I met you.” I said.

“You may have been fine before you met me but after I had met you. After I screwed things up I was the one who wasn’t one” he said.

He looks as good as the day I met him and now I’ve forgotten just why I left him. Was I insane to leave him?

“Ever since I had moved on my friends would feel the need to tell me things. Things about you and us. If it wasn’t from them then it was from a complete stranger no matter what I did I could never escape you. It took me longer than it should have to get over you.” I said.

“What did you expect? That I messaged you out of the blue because I wanted to be friends? I know you don’t love him; the guy you’re seeing because he isn’t me is he? And you know it… so tell me why are you with him? We both know that you are still in love with me. So you shouldn’t be with him… you should be with me. He doesn’t want you like I want you. He doesn’t want you like I want you. He doesn’t need you like I need you. To live without you in my life is like someone taking away my oxygen.” He sad.

“ You can’t, just expect to waltz back into my life as though nothing happened. You have to understand; you can’t just think we can leave where you left off in my chest. Goodbye.” I said as quickly walked away from him as quickly a possible.

He stood there until his initiative kicked in to run after me. He ran, in front of me trying to stop me putting his hands on my shoulders.

“I know what I did your right in what you’re thinking I was an idiot. But Delilah I love you. I know I had no right and you have every right to be mad at me.” He said.

“That’s a line out of movie.” I said snapping at him.

“Yeah maybe so but this is my line to you! This is our moment what we had and what we shared, your willing to throw all that away? What about the times we laughed together, the times I’ve been there a shoulder to cry on. Once upon a times yes, I was a fool but no more. You’ve opened my heart up and it makes me realise not what I had but who I had al along, my best friend – you,” he said.

“Christopher I don’t want to hear anymore of your empty promises. So why don’t you go and tell that other girl your broken promises” I said.

“Look can you just listen to me! Hear me out please?” he cried out in desperation. “For the those four years, I got to see what my life was like without you. And let me tell you it was terrible. I woke up forcing a smile on my face. I was constantly angry with myself for what I did. You were one of the best things that I had happened to me. That other girl I was talking about earlier, the only girl I have ever loved. It was you Delilah. I was talking about you. And I meant every word of what I said. Back when we were together I didn’t know what I had until I drove the one girl I loved away. I love you and want you to give us a chance… please. I will do anything it takes.” he pleaded.

“We’ll always have that spark but I don’t love you the way I love him. We can try this,” I said pointing at one another. Tears of frustration start to surface, I tried hard to fight them back against my tear ducks. But a couple find the escape route and trickle down my cheeks. “But I don’t think I can. We would only hurt each other. All we do once the sparks disappear, all we do is argue and before you know it we are in that vicious circle again. I can’t do it anymore, I love you and I always will but we need to move on. I don’t want to hurt you anymore than you want to hurt me.” I said.

I leaned in. Kissed him on the cheek and walked away.

It’s funny how sparks can fly, and then suddenly disappear. That’s what out love for one another is lie. In one moment we awe in the beauty we see before us and within the same moment somehow we are then left heartbroken, hurt, confused and angry for the sparks are gone.