CHAPTER 7

I swear by the moon and the stars in the sky, I will be there, I swear like the shadow that's by your side, I will be there, for better or worse not even death will do as a part, I will love you with every bit of my heart, I will give you everything I can, I will build your dreams within these two hands, we will make memories of our own and when just the two of us are there, you won't have to ask if I still care course one, it's like a dream come true, two, I just wanna be with you, three, I plan to see that you are the only one for me, four, making my steps: one, two three, five, making you fall in love with me and if ever I believe that my world is done then I will start back at one coz my love for you my dearest Adasa is unconditional. Those were my pledge to Adasa as we exchanged vows at the aisle that beautiful day.

People say that love is like a drug but I say no to that course if love was a drug then I wasn't addicted to it, I was only a victim of circumstances and if loving Adasa was wrong, then I never wanted to be right in this crazy world-course I had found love for myself, a girl who was beautiful and sweet, she was so strong than anyone I knew, she shared not only my dream and hope that someday I will share her home but to carry love and to carry children of our own. I surely don't seem to find the appropriate words to explain how fancy and how good looking we were on that memorable day but what I can say is you can't fight with the matters of the heart, once you were meant to be, then nothing in this world can stop it from happening. It's like when Jesus says yes nobody can say no... that kind of stuff. Well, we had our special moment's which never seemed to last, we traveled around the world with my soulmate, until the unexpected happened after nine good months of pregnancy.

Adasa started suffering from an unknown illness, she began losing weight, turning pale, losing hair, and vomiting just when I was about to think of the worse I took her to the hospital for a check up's only to find out that she had chronic Anemia also known as blood cancer. What the fuck! I thought to myself, was I cursed, or did I do anything to offend my ancestors. Just when I had thought my life was back on track, now this, Lord surely, am I the only one you see, I stood there confused wondering why I was even born in the first place, was I born to suffer the Lucky Dube's way.

It has been two weeks now at the hospital, no changes had occurred, she continuously deteriorated as days went by, the doctor came by in the morning and he had informed me that time was running out and I had to choose between the fate of that of my kid and her mother, he had said my daughter's chances of living were much higher than that of her momma. I was given a sign sheet for the operation to take place and I had no one to blame if anything had happened during that operation, which was to take place at noontime. Noon came just when they were about to drive her out of the intensive unit care to the theater, Adasa asked for a moment with me. I sat there holding onto her hands praying to God that this was not the last moment with her as sting tears rolled down my emaciated cheeks living me as week as a freak.

"That was a foolish thing as a man to do and things I used to hear that men were strong, I know the pain that is putting you through but you have to be strong for our little girl, I want you to name her Silvia and take good care of her, I promise to be there with you always, guiding you from the land above. OH Lord, if I could turn back time at once, if I could pick on God and persuade then I would make it up for you. My love enough now, no more crying it's a brand-new day, I will like to put a smile on your face every day, my love grows up now, it's not too late. Late Adasa be the source of your pride and laughter each and every day this is my gift to you my love stay strong, do not and I mean it, do not give up on your daughter because of me" those were Adasa's words to me that fateful day.

A few hours from then the doctor came and inform me "Mr. Gift congratulation you have a beautiful bouncing baby girl but I want you to be strong, course I have got bad news for you, your wife didn't make it but her last words to us were that she loved you both. I walked down the theater, seeing my wife's lifeless body on top of the bed sucked every bit of life that was on me, it drained every bit of me, I held her body tightly against me as I moaned uncontrollably ... like why? Why? Why? Adasa did you do this to us, it's unfair, I want to die. The doctors came in, trying to comfort me, by telling me I had to be strong for my daughter. The nurse came holding my beautiful cutie little daughter in her hands as she wailed with a loud-soft voice as if she had known what had happened to her mum.

Her wails I could hear from a far distance momma ...momma...momma, Lord, take me instead, I have no breast to feed my daughter, why are you punishing this innocent soul. My mum came in to comfort his son as she held her granddaughter. Son, am here for you, you should be happy that the Lord spared your daughter, the doctor says it wasn't an easy operation to stay strong son, stay strong. I managed to look at my daughter as I held her and comforted her not to cry. "it's going to me okay daughter, we have got each other to care for, don't cry little one, daddy is here for you. It had now dawned on me that my love life was now over forever, it was now, I and my daughter against the world.