It turns up, moving abroad is a lot more complicated than it seems, there was no way I could do everything necessary in a couple of weeks. Xander helped me, but he had a very taking job too, and that’s on top of being a single father of a child who is dealing with a lot more than most children his age.

Could I deal with this? Was I good enough to take care of Eloim?

When he was around, I thought so, but now that I had a lot of time to think about it, I started to doubt myself.

“Don’t worry so much about it,” Xander told me one evening. He had called a little late as he couldn’t free himself much before that, so I was in bed, in the darkness, with my phone against my ear.

“Every parent doubt themselves before having a child, and during, and I’m sure even once they’re old and have left the home. It’s on par for the course. But I think you’ll do fine.”

“Mmh,” I mumbled in vague agreement.

“No one is perfect, we just have to do our best.” I heard him sigh.

“Are you okay?”

“Nothing for you to worry about.”

“Aren’t we supposed to deal with this together?”

He snorted. “I guess we are. I’m just trying to re-create his mood at your place and it’s not working. I think he’s blaming me for the separation and doesn’t trust us that you’re coming.”

I thought about it. “You know what really went pass his block when I met him?”

“What?”

“Miki, then Lily. I think pets really got to him. He wouldn’t look at me in the eyes, put he would in theirs. I guess there is something safe about animals, they don’t lie, they love unconditionally and make their own existence circle around yours.”

“It’s not a bad idea, animal therapy is a thing, but your dog is far right now.”

“How about you make it more concrete for him? I mean the move. Cats are easier to deal with than dogs, they’re more independent and you just have to put them once in their litter box for them to know what to do. I had two cats, but my oldest died last year, and I know Lily is lonelier since. Miki, like all dogs, makes his life circles around people more than other pets. If you’re okay with the idea of a second cat, maybe getting Eloim a kitten. He really made it his business to take care of my pets, taking care of another can be a good way to focus on something other than the gloom, and you can tell him he’s caring for Lily’s new little brother or sister, until they are united. That could put something solid, in his face, that would be a proof that I’m coming. I don’t know if it’ll work, but we could try.”

He was silent for a little while. “I think it’s not a bad idea, but I’m not sure—, I think he would have to hear some of this from you.”

“Sure, you can explain it first, and I reinforce it. You just have to tell me when you can do this, and we sync up.”

“Sure,” he said. “I get that it’s late on your side of the continent and you’re working in the morning, so I’ll leave you at that.”

“Okay.”

“And thanks. I think you helped here.”

“Let’s not cry victory too fast here and just see where it goes.”

He actually followed suit the very next day, and it seemed to work. Eloim had this very serious expression on his face as he was choosing a kitten and he took it home with him, holding his father’s phone all the way and showing me the kitten.

I gave him a few indications on how to care for the cat, and he listened to every word. A little later, Xander put an earpod in his ear so that he could shop for cats stuff with me on the line. It was cute, sometimes he’d borrow the phone and switch the camera on to show me different things to choose and I had to rail him in a few times, I heard Xander do the same a few others, so that the house would not be swamped with cat toys.

We talked later in the evening, Xander and I. He was in a better mood, saying how he thought the whole cat idea was working wonders.

We developed this new routine of talking every day, while I was in bed. Sometimes a few minutes, sometimes longer. He told me a bit about his family, and me about mine.

At work, Eloim started to call me secretly. I managed to make him limit this to my lunch break, so that it would not impede on my work, and soon he would call like clockwork.

It made Xander laugh when I told him, and though he offered to make him stop, I told him it was fine and I could deal with it. So Eloim had his regular calls with me around my dinner time most evenings, and his secret calls during lunch time. I think he’s not angry with me anymore.

I would text Xander whenever I had a question, and he also sent me a few pictures of his town house in London, and at my request, the other house.

It was huge. He had changed the windows, and redone the roofing so there were no more leak. It was at least a few hundred years old. There are not so many houses this old around here, but those had always triggered something in me. I always found a sort of Romanticism in old house, they have a soul. And seeing my reaction, he suggested we could finish the renovations he had put on a relative hold—doing only the basic work so to make it at least sellable—and maybe consider moving in. It got my creativity going wild. There was enough space in there that I could have my own little art studio, it seemed so extravagant and wild, but he seemed to enjoy my reactions, and arranged to have someone do a video tour for us to show where things were.

The next day, he told me he rehired a contractor and told me I could help redesign the kitchen and a few other rooms when we’d be together again, which made my mind going crazy, and I found myself waking up at night to draw a few ideas.

The idea of dating again had really sunk in by now, and I had overhauled my diet, and I started training again. A few years of celibacy had made me let go a little. It wasn’t too bad, but I had been in a better shape before. I did catch Xander after he came back from the gym in his building one day.

“You train often?” I asked.

He gave me a sheepish smile. “I had let myself go lately, I getting back on track.”

That made me laugh. “I started doing squats,” I confessed.

It made him laugh.

I had to admit to my parents that I would be leaving. So I told them I was dating and would move in with him. They did feel like it was rushed, but as I didn’t mention a marriage yet, it wasn’t as bad as it could be. I could tell them later.

I began emptying my place slowly.

I sorted things to have sent out to the UK, and Xander did follow through with the shipping, helping me with it.

It took a few more weeks until I had a replacement tenant signing his lease and freeing me from mine. I had a few things shipped at my brother’s place so that he could sell the few things left for me.

And after nearly four weeks of planning, I was about to board a plane for the US.