Cassey’s P.O.V.

A week later has passed. I have been spending most of my time trying to find a good job, or at least. A decent and legal job, but so far. No profession took interest in my field, nor my experiences. Since I was only able to finish the strand of Accounting, I didn't really finish my course. But it’s still business related right? Yet without a field of experience and the lack of that thing they called as a ‘diploma’, or whatever that piece of paper is. No company would even invite me for an interview. Once they even offered me the job of a janitress, or an assistant. But no, I don’t want that. I worked too 'hard' and studied too 'diligently' to end up as a trash collector. I can’t just bring my pride down, I mean. A bully turned into a janitress? Imagine the humiliation! What would happen if my friends saw me carrying a mop around?! I'd be a laughing stock!

“You’re tiring yourself too much, have you even ate lunch yet?” I heard my brother question from the other line on the phone. Well to be honest, guess I haven’t had breakfast… yet. Guess I got too busy that I actually forgot, now that it’s mentioned. Guess I’m pretty hungry myself. What time is it even? I should've checked my watch-- never mind, I forgot. I sold it.

“I’m fine, worry about yourself. Dr. Lacson will be there any minute for your monthly check-up. Focus on your health first okay? Little sister will be A-Okay. Just a few more rounds and I might bring home the bacon tonight!” I stated, even though I wasn’t sure about it. I couldn’t help but spat it out, making my big brother worry is the last thing Mom and Dad would want me to do. All I can do for now is to sugar coat the facts!

I sighed in exhaustion and sat by a bench on the park. I remember the times when Mom and Dad would take us here for picnic, we would have a large checkered blanket sprawled on the grass. And the usual pic-nick basket containing our snacks. Then we could watch the stars at night while sleeping on the grass. Mom would hug me so close, I could barely feel the breeze. Sigh, I missed this.

Though I can’t bring that Back. Not until I find a job that can help me make that happen. This all relies to me now.

Glancing on the newspaper I had, a few were marked with red. Means rejected, they rejected me. I have never been so rejected in my entire life! It’s hard to find a job without a degree, so I have to cope up with janitor work. It’s either I deal with it, or we both suffer. But brother... I can't delay him for something so crucial!

“Cassey! Is that you? “ I heard a voice chipper from behind, glancing behind me. I met eye to eye with my ‘best friends ‘Damien and Jessica, it’s been so long since I’ve last seen them! Could you believe how time just flies out of your window and dared not to look back?

Why does it remind me of the times I threw things out the window?

“The one and only.“ I gave out my signature grin out. I have to look confident still, no one knew about my situation since I never dare mention to my friends that I am poor now.

“Girl it’s been a while, how have you been doing? Why did you quit college so early? We only have like, 1 more year to graduate.” Jessica asked, though I wouldn’t want to answer either way. It’s dreadful, yet as Cassandra Rose Villanueva would do. Keep your head held up high, and no one will notice the tears that stream down your cheeks. No one bothers to see them anyways, so why bother?

“Well you know me, I decided to take responsibility at an early age. Aren’t I too great and responsible to face the world at such an early age?” I can’t help but feel like I’m only mocking myself. It’s not like I have any choice anyways. What would they say about me if they found out? Will they act out as if they don't know me?

“Wow, responsible? Is that even you Cassey? How dazzling! Any who, we have more things to attend to,. See you soon! “Without a second to waste, my two friends came running to a direction, honestly the real me would ditch work and follow them along, but not anymore sadly. No, they can’t know anything. Or maybe, they noticed the newspaper I was holding? Did they hear about the news of the Villanueva Family? If so, then how much more do they know? What do they think of me now?

Maybe it's fated that I was born in a rich family. Yet now, I'm handing out my somewhat "empty" resume while saving money to the point I dared not to have breakfast still? I wonder…

What could’ve happened if Mom and Dad didn’t leave us? Would I still be at college right now? Bullying dorks and pissing teachers off their wits? This isn’t fucking fair! Why me?! Of all people why me?! There are more evil people in the world! More evil than me! But why. Why does it have to be me?

I sighed and shook my head. My grief won’t feed me and my brother anyways. So what’s the point? What’s the point in asking? It’s no use. I'm just rhetorically ridiculing myself even more.

I have to strive. I have to dream. I have to achieve. And most of all, I have to work hard!

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5 years later…..

It has been 5 years. Alyn hasn’t been any better. I’m 21 years old now, and I still can’t find a stable job. During my 5 years, I worked as a dishwasher, a janitress, and an all-around helper. I even went in as a domestic helper in my local community. But I can’t, my life so far is to find freelance jobs. Work around the clock at 6-9 months, then find another job. My brother hasn’t been in good shape also. I can’t buy all of his medications all the time. And his monthly diagnosis is a month late always. I tried all I could but it’s hopeless, my brother couldn’t find a job too due to his condition. Is this retribution?

Right now I’m at the sidewalk of a random street. I still remember the events this morning. when Mrs. Moors literally kicked me out of her household. I don’t know how to take care of children and accidentally burned the child’s tongue when I prepared milk. I didn’t know the milk was that hot. I got fired within my first 2 months of work there. Why is working and finding a job so hard?!

But then again, I could remember those times when I used to bully my maids. I would play cruel pranks on them. Then make them the scapegoats of my wrong doings. Firing them at my own will and making their life miserable. How cruel was I? Is this how they felt when they took their bags and left my home in tears? Is this the feeling of remorse?

All I can do is hold my newspaper. Which once again, had the list of advertisement for job openings. This is hopeless. I can’t keep up like this, I need a permanent and reliable job. Something that can help me earn huge. So I can tend to my brother’s needs. Also my own.

Though as odd as it is. I feel uneasy, as if someone’s eyes has been piercing through me. A hard stare. I looked left and right. No one was around. I was by the streets in a nearby alleyway where I threw away the useless newspaper I had high hopes on. But I couldn’t shake the feeling of being stared at, and that feeling is making me shiver, I have to get out of here fast.

TAP

TAP

TAP…

“Don’t make this hard for the both of us. Give us your bag and phone, now.”