16: I Want You

Nolan


I lied down in bed, trying to ignore the fact that Olivia was just an inch away from me.
Even though her back was turned, I could still smell her. I wanted to touch her; hold her even. But maybe she was right. We couldn't get in too deep. We still have about two months left of this, and I know me. I was bound to hurt her.

I silently cursed myself, then sat up slowly as not to wake her. I couldn't sleep at all, so I went out into the living area to maybe watch TV for a while. To my surprise, Jared and nova were both still up watching 'Prison Break'. I see he's determined to finish that show before we get back.

I shook my head in amusement, making myself comfortable on the couch. "What's the matter?" Nova asked me, looking over in my direction. "I heard you got bit by the love bug," she grinned, wiggling her eyebrows.

"I didn't get bit by anything," I grumbled.

"Oh yeah!" She laughed, throwing a pillow at me. "Never seen you in such a bad mood before." I tossed the pillow on the floor, then rolled my eyes at the pair of them.

"I don't know why I came out here." I mumbled under my breath, slipping out onto the dock. They were getting on my nerves; I wasn't in the mood to play around. I screwed up big time. The first time I actually meet a girl who's not completely despicable, and I can't even do anything with her because I'm paying her deceive everyone.

How do I even undo this? I can't.

"Woah man." Jared said, coming outside, Nova trailing not too far behind him. "You okay?" He asked, and I rolled my eyes.

"Not you two again." I groaned, going to sit by the pool.

"Never seen you so upset before, I thought your string of lies was working out for you." Jared said, amusement dancing on his face.

"My string of lies is working just fine," I told him sternly, shaking my head. "That's the problem."

"You really like her, don't you?" Nova asked, sitting down on the ground next to me.

"No!" I yelled, then stopped when I realized I was getting too emotional about it. "I don't like her... okay..." I trailed off, ignoring the look they both exchanged with each other. "I've just been thinking about my Mom that's all. She woulda been so... disappointed in me."

"Been trying to tell you that all along," Jared sighed, shaking his head.

"Listen," Nova started. "Let's just say for a second that you do like her. Why not take her out on a real date?" She asked, maybe trying to cheer me up. "Girls still like dates you know." She smiled, shaking her head.

"Plus, you kinda owe her," Jared chimed in. "For being such a dick on her birthday."

"And don't even think about seducing her!" Nova imputed, pointing at me sternly. "If a woman likes you with her heart, her body is going to follow. When she's ready!"

"Yeah, well..." I trailed off, placing my hand behind my neck guiltily. "Might be a little late for that." I cringed, watching as they both shook their head disapprovingly.

"I can't believe you." Nova said.

"I can!" Jared scoffed. "And what did she say anyways?"

"She said no." I said simply with a shrug.

"No?" Jared asked. "That's it?"

"Look, she said she doesn't have experience and she wants to keep things professional." I said quickly, wishing they would get off my back about it.

"So she's a virgin..." Nova trailed off knowingly, like it was the simplest equation ever.

"What? No! Why is that your assumption?" I asked, annoyed that she even suggested it.

"Okay," she said in a tone that was disbelieving, holding her hands up.

"It doesn't matter," Jared sighed. "Just take her out on a real date. Shouldn't be too hard for you since you technically have never been on one yourself. Maybe you'll both like it." He encouraged, and I gathered ideas up in my head.

I did want to make things up to her. Maybe this would be how I can.


~*~


After spending all night searching for the perfect date to take Olivia on, I proudly settled on something that I hoped she would enjoy.
Verona was our last stop before heading back towards home, so I bought two tickets to 'Romeo & Juliet' the play.

I don't know what woman wouldn't want to see this play in the heart of where it stemmed from. Once I got back on my outing with my father and brother, I spotted her by her favorite place; the pool.

I crept up behind her, watching as she sunbathed on the pool lounger. "Guess who." I smiled through my shades, bending down beside her and she smiled before she even opened up her eyes.

"Fred?" She asked sarcastically, and I saw the hint of a smile on her face.

"You guessed it." I grinned, playing along with her games. "I got you something." I said, putting the tickets in her face. She opened her eyes slowly, at first confused, then took them from my hands to read them.

"You got us tickets to see 'Romeo & Juliet'?" She exclaimed, staring at me through bright blue eyes. "Wait... is everyone going?" She asked suddenly, and I shook my head.

"Nope. Just you and me." I answered, watching as the realization filled her face.

"You... and me?" She asked, seemingly unconvinced, and I nodded. "As in..." she trailed off, eyeing me with close scrutiny.

"A date- a real one. But that's only if you want to." I sighed, making it seem like I didn't care as much as I did.

She didn't even respond, she just stood to her feet and started to scream. "I'm going to see Romeo and Juliet!" She yelled out to the ocean. "In Verona!" She jolted with excitement, then threw her arms around me before darting down the hall.

I blinked in response. I had hoped she would be excited but I didn't realize she would be this excited. I had fun gauging her reaction, and I idly wondered if I should let her get dressed in peace or go and tease her as she did.

"I see you're taking your wife out," my Dad pointed out, pulling me out of my head.

"Oh," I started, standing to my feet. "Yeah, since our last night in Italy and everything." I rambled on, trying to hide the heat that crept on my face.

"Son. That is the secret to a lasting marriage." He nodded his approval, sipping on a cold beer. "I remember taking your mother to see that play." He smiled proudly, leaning on the doorframe. "I miss that woman."

"Yeah... me too." I sighed. "I'm gonna go get ready."

I took it upon myself to get dressed in Jared's room. Since Nova was helping Olivia get ready, I assumed that she wanted her privacy. I put on my best black, velvet suit, and hoped that by some miracle I didn't screw things up more than I already had.

After I was done getting dressed, I waited for Olivia in the living room. I don't know why, but I felt like a nervous teenager; like I was getting ready to pick up my prom date. This is why I don't do things like this. It's too risky, too many uncontrollable emotions. I could already feel my palms sweating, and for a second I even questioned why I was doing this to myself.

That was until I saw her.

I looked up for a second, and she was ascending the hall of the yacht. When I laid my eyes on her I knew exactly why I was putting myself through this. Somehow she got the whole velvet memo, and wore a tight red, mine velvet dress that hung off her shoulders and hugged all her curves perfectly. It even came with a matching set of red velvet gloves.

I didn't even realize I was holding my breath until she stood in front of me, staring at me shyly. Her hair was pulled to the side, and she was wearing red lipstick to match her dress. I honestly don't even know what's hotter than a woman in a red dress, and seeing the way her dark hair fell around her made me really wonder why I only messed around with blondes.

"You look absolutely beautiful," I said before I could even stop myself. I didn't even mean to say it aloud.

"Thank you," she smiled softly, grabbing a black coat to put around her.

"Please," I started, reaching for it. "Let me." She smiled softly at me still, turning around so that I could drape the coat around her shoulders. "Ready?" I asked her, once she was all nice and warm.

"Wow!" Olivia gawked, staring at everything around us so mesmerized. "I've never seen something more beautiful in my lifetime." She sighed, gazing around at the arena as we took our seats. "Have you been here before?" She whispered to me as the lights dimmed.

"No." I answered simply, sitting back in my seat.

"It's beautiful isn't it?" She asked, grinning like a small child on Christmas Day. I smiled softly at her, wondering how in the hell I could ever be so stupid.

"You're beautiful." I said to her, watching as she shifted in her seat from my compliment. She stopped smiling immediately to look at me, and the only reason why she looked away was because the play was about to begin.

Throughout the play, there were bursts of laughter, of excitement, of anger. Any emotion you can think of in a collective breath. While everyone was watching Romeo & Juliet, I was watching Olivia. There was no greater art than her.

I ate up all of her reactions, I even furrowed my brows and watched as she silently cried at the end. To tell you the truth, I can't even really tell you what happened in the play.

I was pulled out of my head by a sudden burst of clapping, followed by the lights coming back on. The cast bowed, flowers were thrown, and the curtains closed. I watched as Olivia stood to her feet, and quickly followed.

Without even thinking about it, I held her hand as we walked out of the arena. She didn't say much to me though, I figured she was still in her head about the play. In fact, she didn't say a word until we were almost back at the dock.

"I didn't even know..." she trailed off, looking out the window of the car the whole time.

"Know what?" I asked, surprised that she was actually speaking again.

"All the life I could be living," she said simply, her voice sounding deep and forlorn.

I honestly didn't even know what to say. I thought she would be happy to see the play, but now I see, I only showed her things she's been missing out on. I didn't even realize how selfish of me this was; to give her all these things and take her to all these places then send her back to the bottom of the barrel once I was done using her up.

Of course, I try to do something good the first time and it completely backfires on me as usual. The driver parked us right in front of the dock, and I sighed as I helped Olivia out of the car after me.

I tried not to feel so shitty as I watched her look out at the water. The dock was so beautiful, you could see the yacht in the distance, and the pathway was lit up with string lights that lit up the dark.

"It's funny, I almost don't want the night to end," she smiled, and I watched as she laid the coat out just at the edge of the dock and sat down as best she could with a dress on. I took off my suit jacket, and mimicked her actions, sitting directly across from her.

She stretched out her legs and crossed them one over the other, leaning back on her hands to look up at the stars. "Oh, are we star gazing now?" I asked her, chuckling slightly.

"Yeah." She grinned, placing her hand over her mouth as she laughed. "I always wanted to do this."

"A lot of firsts, huh?" I asked, cocking my head to the side.

"Lots!" She exclaimed, and I took the liberty to scoot a little bit closer to her.

"Did you like the play?" I asked, and she nodded her response.

"I loved it!" She smiled. "I can't believe I only ever read it."

"You saw the movie didn't you?" I asked, raising a brow.

"Doesn't even hold a candle to that play." She shook her head, and I shrugged. "Thank you." She smiled, and I could feel a smile slowly inching across my face.

"It was my pleasure, Olivia." When I said that, she closed her eyes, and I idly wondered why.

"When I was younger," she started, staring back up at the sky. "I used to read everything and anything I could get my hands on. I mean I... I've read stories that I still think about until this day." She sighed, and I actually sat and listened to what someone else had to say for once.

"I've visited places in my head, and lived full lives all through words. For the longest time, I thought that was enough. I've never been lonely; I've never longed for anything really. Instead I lived in this meticulously crafted daydream universe that I created in my head. I used it as a coping mechanism. I convinced myself it was enough. I never told anyone that." She finished, and I was so shocked at her opening up to me that I didn't even know what to say. "Tonight you made me realize... it's not enough for me." She shrugged, and I sighed in response.

"I didn't mean to make you feel like that." I told her, and she shook her head dismissively.

"No," she said. "Don't feel bad. You opened my eyes Noel. I don't want to just read about these places anymore, I want to see them with my own eyes in this life. I don't want to live in a daydream anymore." She shook her head softly, and without thinking I reached out to grab her hand.

"You don't have to." I said suddenly.

"Do you think that's why my father left?" She asked. "Because he realized there was a whole world that he couldn't give us? Or did he just realize there was a whole world that he wanted outside of us?" She asked me, and I furrowed my brows in confusion.

"I don't know, Olivia. I know he's a terrible fool for leaving you though." I said honestly, and she smiled lovingly at me. "Come on, let's get you inside." I helped her up to her feet, then picked our coats up off the floor.

For once in my life I enjoyed the company of a woman without wondering what she could do for me. I only wanted to know what more I could do for her. She seemed like a person who had been through so much, and she's had such a short life. I swear I didn't even realize how different our worlds were, and how good I had it.

I didn't know what the future held for Olivia and I, but what I did know was that I wanted her around as more than just a paid wife. I wanted her in my life for the long haul; however long that was.

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