“Are you unwell?” A deep baritone voice asked with concern. I must look miserable, but what should a girl with a broken heart look like? 

         “I just need to get out of here.” I managed to say those words after a great deal of trepidation. I didn’t want to see anyone, let alone Cameron, at this stage of distress. There was ice in my vein I couldn’t get rid of, and it froze my heart.

         Cameron looked long at me before replying decisively.

         “Let me go with you.”

         I took in a deep breath, and with a slight movement of my head in agreement, Cameron grabbed his coat and held my hand. We started walking along the concrete street onto Hyde Park. 

         Lamp-lit the vast green space of trees and ponds, the wind was cold, and as we stepped on the dried fallen red leaves, I started to calm down with the serenity of the surrounding. I admired Cameron in his approach to comforting me. He didn’t ask a question. He didn’t say anything to fill the silence. He just walked next to me. 

         The park gave me a chance to think or maybe not to think at all. I replaced my thought of Sophia’s infidelity with some other thoughts. All attention was turned to the man next to me.

         “How have you been?” After a long walk, I finally broke our silence. Cameron’s eyes seemed to sparkle in the dimmed atmosphere.

         “So, the Ice Princess has spoken. I’m doing fine. I’m in banking now. The dreary job I once strongly criticized, but fate is cruel.” He gave me a charming smile. But his remark still irked me.

         “You still use that tacky nickname for me?”

         “Well, your eyes are blue. I thought it to be an obvious choice. A bit unimaginative and overly used, yes, but it was the first thing that comes to mind.” He tightened his grip on my hand. Surely, he was being nostalgic. At least, I was.

         “Still, very tacky.” When he called me, I was reminded of all those times we spent together long ago. Back when I was in his arms, he told me unfunny jokes. Cameron was a true intellectual, and it was his stoic and serious persona that I was attracted to. I remembered those three years spent with him fondly. My life was different then. More free and unrestrained. Cameron let me into his world, and I went wild with the freedom and friends he introduced. 

         “You are not asking me the question?” His eyes were unreadable; with the dark of the night, Cameron was mysterious to me. It was possible I didn’t know him anymore, but I sensed that with him, I was safe. 

         “If you feel comfortable telling me, you would.” He always knows me well. He knew when to speak and when not to speak.

         We sat on the park bench and watched people walking by. His hand was warm in my mind. I recalled the last time I met him. It was the same day we broke up, and the same day I told him my decision to go back to the states. 

         “I’m back, by the way. I’m back to London for work.” I finally told him. It was unexpected to see him again. I told him about my work in Silicon Valley. I told him of my hope of succeeding despite thinking the job was beyond me. For some reason, I didn’t think to mention Sophia. I didn’t want to think of her now. I didn’t want to explain about her to Cameron. I didn’t want to spoil this moment.

         Cameron smiled, knowing that I would be in town for months, even years, this time.

         “That’s wonderful. I’m looking forwards to seeing more of you.” That wasn’t a statement he threw around but a promise.

****

         “So, he invited you to dinner,” Nora asked me as she spread clotted cream and jam on her scone. Lucky, it was the weekend, and I had some time off to think and discuss the matter with her friend.

         “A dinner that two old friends got more time to talk. It will be very platonic.” I explained myself, but Nora wasn’t having any of it. I bet she could see right through me.

         “If memories serve me, you two never stay platonic. When you were together, I still remember all the stories you told me that made me blush.” She looked at me past the brim of her teacup as she held it up to sip the hot liquid.

         “Things changed, and people changed. And there is this mess with Sophia, I’ve told you. I’m not hundred percent sure, but the evidence is overwhelming.” She must hear the dread in my tone, but Nora went on as if she had heard this story a thousand times.

         “Oh, and there is that. How do you plan to deal with it? Five years together, is it? Well, I believe you passed the fluffy butterfly in your stomach part a long time ago. If she confesses, will you leave her?”

         “I don’t know.” That was the difficult part, planning for the next step. Those words rang in my ears. Will I leave Sophia? Will I be able to leave Sophie? I doubted that. She was my rock. She gave me my purpose. She was my purpose. And I knew that by easily forgiving her, I lost respect for myself. 

         “I take that as a no. I don’t know always means no in my book.” She said with confidence as she took more bites out of that scone.

         “I want to still be with her…I shouldn’t, but I still want to. It’s unthinkable to live without her.” Thinking about leaving Sophia, tears welled up. I looked around at people at other tables enjoying their day. Nothing wrong happened to the world. People lived their jolly life on this pleasant Saturday afternoon while I could barely sleep and spent every minute suppressing the blood from this internal gaping wound. 

         “Love is an addiction. A terrible addiction, my dear. But at least I hope you got something out of this terrible betrayal.”

         It was a betrayal, and for once, I didn’t know what to do. But for one thing that I learned about dealing with problems, if I can’t solve my own problem, then I must know more about how other people solve their problems. 

         “Nora, can you tell me more about this deal between you and Peter again, please?”