By the time Friday rolled around I had managed to talk dad into letting me have a sleepover at Greta’s. I packed my school bag with clothes and headed off to school on the bus. Because of my betrayal, my guilt forced me into pushing myself too hard academically. By the time I made it to music I felt exhausted. I collapsed into my seat and greta leaned across.

“You don’t look so good.”

“I’m okay.” I yawned.

“Are you? because you barely spoke at lunch and now you look like death warmed up.”

“Gee thanks.” I replied sardonically. “I’m just brain fucked. I focused on my classes extra hard because of the party and the lying to my father about my whereabouts.”

“I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that.” Lex murmured as he stood over Greta and I. He handed a folded over piece of paper. “I requested your music transcripts pre-junior year from your old school. I thought you might like to read this.”

He walked away, and I smiled as I watched him. Greta let out a giggle and shoulder barged me. “I can almost see the tiny little cupids flying around both of your heads in a daze.”

I turned to look at her, before looking around to make sure no one had heard her. Luckily the room was filled with chatter louder than hers. I narrowed my eyes and looked at the piece of paper.

“We’re friends.” I muttered.

“Fast friends.”

“Like you and me?” I noted. “Are there cupids flying around our heads as well?”

She rolled her eyes as she let out a sigh and pointed to the paper. “Well, are you going to read it?”

I nodded and slowly unfolded the paper. Mrs Corsan, my music teacher from Sophomore year had written a reference letter on my behalf to be admitted to a prestigious music program in New York. I hadn’t heard anything about it, so I guess I hadn’t made it, but she had tried for me and that meant something. I handed the letter to Greta who read it then handed it back.

“Did you know about that?”

I shook my head. “I had no idea.”

“I wonder if your Dad knew. If the application on your behalf went any further they would have had to have contacted him due to your age.”

She was right, in fact the letter was dated only a few months before the time he banned me from anything music. I just shrugged, my father was all kinds of strict, but hiding something like this from me was beyond even him.

I folded the paper up and shoved it inside my music theory book. I looked up at Lex just as he looked over at me. He smiled and then pulled his glance away and looked around the class.

“Okay guys, This morning in my email an acquaintance sent me details for a national battle of the bands. I have details at the front if you think you want to take part. Sectionals are in one month Regionals are in 6 weeks and the national final is in 12 weeks. Competition will be stiff, but I have faith in you all and think any one of you has the chops to make a dent in the competition. My band will be entering too.”

Lex looked at me, I guess to gauge my reaction. Truth be told, I was kind of excited as I listened to him speak about it. A rush of adrenalin raced through me. being on a real stage in front of a real audience, trying to prove my worth appealed to me on a level I couldn’t even begin to explain. I smiled at him, then looked down at the robots on my desk.

After class I was packing my book back into my bag when lex walked over. “You need a ride to Rehearsal?”

I shook my head and pointed to Greta who was already on her way out the door.

“I’ve got that party tonight. Greta is going to bring me to rehearsal once we drop my things off at her place.”

Lex nodded and then handed the battle of the bands info sheet to me. “Sorry I sort of sprung it on you. I haven’t even told the guys yet.”

I smiled and looked over the sheet. The finals were in New York, which could be a problem if I was going to keep it from my father, but sectionals and regionals were both only an hours drive away.

“I’m actually excited, so it’s okay.” I was surprised by the fact myself.

“You are?”

“Yes. I better go, I’ll see you in an hour Lex.”

“See you soon Addie.”

I readjusted my bag and then walked out of the classroom. Greta grabbed me the moment I was out and began to make kissy noises. “Finished macking on our teacher?”

“Macking? Are we in the 90’s or something?” I replied dryly. “He just asked if I needed a ride.”

Greta let out a muffled laugh. “A ride or a ride.”

I shook my head. “Let’s go. I have a rehearsal to get to.”

Greta’s place was so big it was almost palatial. I had never been in a home quite so extravagant. Greta pulled on my arm. “Come on, lets dump your stuff.”

Greta took me to her room, which was at least four times bigger than my own. It was filled with eclectic knick knacks spliced with almost gothic furnishings. It was a hipster music girls dream. I placed my bag on the floor by her black desk.

“Come on, the sooner rehearsal is done, the sooner we can party!” She giggled. “this will be the first one where I don’t feel completely out of place.”

I smiled, but behind it I couldn’t help but wonder if going to this party was what I really wanted. Greta must have caught my insecurity because she placed her hand on my shoulder. “You’re going to have a blast Addie. I promise.”

We left soon after, when we made it to the warehouse only Jed and Lex were there. I walked over to one of the seats and sat down. Greta walked over to Jed and sat beside him.

“we’re going back to mine and getting ready after Addie’s finished here.” I heard Greta tell Jed with excitement. “You should come. Addie wouldn’t mind, she’s supposed to be meeting up with Ethan there anyway.”

I smiled, I still wasn’t so sure about this Ethan thing. Lex didn’t seem to like him much and I kind of got a strange vibe too. I looked over at Lex who was caught up on the computer. He glanced up at Greta and Jed as they spoke then looked over at me. Our eyes met and for a moment I wondered if he wanted to say something, but then he looked back down without a word.

“Okay, sure, sounds like a blast and if I get to hang with you.” Jed replied.

Greta made a kind of coo sound and then snuggled into Jed’s chest. Lex shut the laptop screen and let out a loud sigh. “Where the hell is Keiran.” He finally exclaimed, sounding more than a little pissed off.

“Relax, he’s probably on his way.” Jed called out.

“He’s late. I wanted to talk about the battle of the bands thing I mentioned in my text earlier.”

“Dude, we have plenty of time.”

Lex sighed and picked up his guitar. He plucked at the strings for a while, before beginning a song I hadn’t heard before. As the music went on I watched him begin to relax. It was almost therapeutic. As he finished the song Kieran burst through the door.

“Sorry I’m late. For once it’s not about a girl either.” He mentioned as he looked over at Lex.

“You’re here now. Let’s get started.”

Kieran shot Lex a look, one I didn’t understand but nodded none the less. Jed stood up as well and walked over to his drums. Lex smiled at me as I approached him then handed me a guitar.

“Alright, so I’ve told you all singularly, but I want to enter us in the battle of the bands. I know Addie has only been with us such a short time, but I really feel like were complete and that we could take this thing out.”

“I’m in.” All three of us said immediately, Greta let out a laugh. “I think that is what they call a unanimous outcome.”

“Great well, we’d better practice hard. Let’s get on with it.”

by 8pm we had run through an entire set list. We had work to do, chords to tighten, harmonies to perfect, but it felt good. I placed the guitar down on the stand and went to walk away, but Lex called me back.

“You did well today, I noticed you’ve pretty much learned the guitar parts too. How is that even possible?”

“Your music, it’s inspiring, makes me want to learn quick you know.”

“I’m glad you like it. Hey uh, have fun tonight.” He swallowed hard then picked his laptop up.

“Thanks. See you later.”

Greta and I drove back to her place and got ready. She handed me clothing that I would usually never wear and told me to get dressed. I put them on, only because the t-shirt and jeans I had been wearing all day were hardly party appropriate. Jed met us outside at 9pm and drove us to the dock.

I guess I expected more than a bunch of people standing around drinking out of red solo cups. I expected dancing and raucous idiots. But what I got was groups of people segregated chatting. Greta pulled on my arm and led me toward Ethan. He was dressed in his usual hipster garb, smiling like he knew a secret no one else did. His eyes widened when he saw me and he bit his lip.

“Wow Addie, you look great.”

I pulled at the denim of the short shorts and smiled uneasily. “Uh, thanks. You too.”

Greta leaned in and whispered in my ear. “I’ll leave you two to get acquainted. Jed and I are just outside.”

I watched as she walked away, and I couldn’t help but think she had thrown me in the deep end without anything to keep me afloat. When I looked back at Ethan he was staring at my chest.

“Uh sorry.” He replied, returning his gaze to meet my own. “I didn’t pick you for a even stevens fan.”

I looked down at the singlet I was wearing, it was for an old punk band, circa 1980’s. Despite the fact the shirt belonged to Greta, I actually did like them too.

“Well you know, looks can deceive and all that jazz, I like messoda after all.”

“Oh yeah.” Ethan said nodding like he knew what I was talking about. Except I got the feeling he couldn’t actually remember.

“So um, you come to many of these?”

“Parties? Yeah all of them. Do you want a drink?”

“yeah.” I replied, impressed he had offered me one. Maybe he wasn’t so bad after all.

“Oh cool, I’ll take one too. Another brewski, keg is over there.”

I almost scoffed in shock, but walked toward the area where most of the people stood. I poured two cups of beer and then walked back toward Ethan. He took the cup and began drinking without so much of thanks.

“So should we go sit somewhere a little quieter?” Ethan murmured.

I nodded and followed behind him. We sat outside under a tree and for a while we talked about school, and our interests. It was nice until Ethan leaned in and pressed his lips to mine. I didn’t expect that my first kiss would feel like it did. It was warm and wet, but when his tongue slid inside my mouth I coiled back in disgust. It wasn’t the act, I could imagine this feeling good with someone I cared about, but Ethan wasn’t that guy.

“This is wrong.” I said placing my hand on his chest, firmly pushing him back. “I’m sorry.”

“You’re kidding right?”

“I like you Ethan, but I guess just as a friend.”

His eyebrows furrowed and he stood up. “I had a $100 bet riding on you bitch.” He grabbed his jacket off my back and walked away. “Fucking tease.”

I felt my eyes moisten. He’d been nice when he thought he could get something out of me, but when I had denied that opportunity ever arising he had burned me. I needed to leave the party, and now. I looked for Greta everywhere, but I couldn’t find her so I left. I walked from the party, still shocked by how quickly everything had turned sour. The taste of Ethan’s beer was still on my lips. As I walked into the darkness I wiped my lips with my arm. Desperate to wash away the taste. Greta’s short shorts, and oversized singlet weren’t enough to keep me warm as I walked, but I had no choice.

The fuzz of the alcohol had begun to affect me as I walked down the dimly lit road. All I could think about was Lex, and how his warning had been warranted. I pulled my phone out and sent him a message.

You were right. – Addie

About? – Lex

Ethan. – Addie.

Did he hurt you Addie. Are you okay, you’re at that party aren’t you? – Lex

I was. I left. I’ll be home soon. No he didn’t hurt me, just my ego. – Addie

Are you getting a ride home? – Lex

No. I’m alright. – Addie.

A few seconds later my phone began to ring, caller ID brought up Lex’s name so I swiped and answered. “I’m fine Lex. I’m almost home.” I lied.

“Where are you?” He sounded angry, really angry.

“I don’t know.” I whispered. I really wasn’t sure where I was, or where home was. The entire town seemed so different in the light, and even then I wasn’t sure where everything was yet.

“Addie… Are there any parks or anything around.”

“I can see a grandstand. It has ivy’s growing on it. It’s really pretty.” I mused.

“Where.”

“Over there silly.” I giggled, I’d only had a beer, but the effects were making themselves known.

“Addie. How far from you?”

“across the road.”

“Stay right there. I’m coming to get you.”

I sighed and looked around. “Alright.”

A few minutes later Lex’s car pulled up beside me. I hopped in and pulled the belt on. “You were walking around in that.” He murmured.

“Yes.” I replied annoyed. “Why, is it slutty?”

“You can dress however you like Addie. But it’s cold out, we’re in the middle of winter for cripes sakes.”

“I don’t feel cold.” I lied, I’d felt cold the minute Ethan had taken his jacket from me.

“That’ll be the alcohol. Seriously, I thought you were smarter than that.”

“Stop patronizing me Lex. I’m your student Monday to Friday during school hours.” I replied. “After that I’m not your responsibility. Can you take me home please.”

“I feel responsible for you.” He replied.

“Well you’re not. You’re just someone I met five days ago, I barely know you.” I felt bad even saying the words, but this crush was getting out of hand and the way he worried about me, while it was slightly annoying, it also felt good. Too good.

He sighed and didn’t say anything else, not until we pulled up outside my house. “Shit.” I grumbled.

Dad’s car was in the driveway. I’d checked, he was supposed to be working a night shift, which meant he wouldn’t be home until 3am. It was unusual for him not to be at work when he was rostered on. Dad’s work ethic was as rock solid as they come. But he was home and all the lights were on.

“I can take you to Greta’s?” He offered.

“Last time I saw her she was with Jed. They disappeared. She said she’d meet up with me at 12 and we’d go home together.” I sighed. “I couldn’t find her, her parents are away. I’d be breaking in.”

Lex laughed. “Teenage rebellion.”

“I guess.”

“Uh, I’ll take you back to my place until you can get hold of Greta.” He murmured.

“You’re okay with that?” I questioned.

“I don’t have much choice do I?” he replied, he sounded frustrated, and I was guilty I’d made him feel that way, but he was right.

“I’m sorry.” I murmured as he began driving again. “I was just feeling down, I took it out on you.”

“Feeling down about Ethan?” He replied.

“Yes.” I replied.

“What happened?” he asked.

My face blushed, I felt the heat rise up through my cheeks to the top of my head. I didn’t want to admit that Ethan had been my lackluster first kiss. Not at 17 almost 18 years old, and I especially didn’t want to admit it to Lex. I had to talk about it though, and he was the only one around.

“We were talking. It was fine, laidback.” I murmured. “Then after a while he kissed me.”

“Oh.” Lex replied, his tone was surprised, which in turn surprised me. I tried not to let it bother me, but I couldn’t help but wonder why he was so surprised.

“It was odd. I guess I should have liked it, but I didn’t. It felt wrong.” I murmured.

“So not like before.”

“before?” I questioned.

“With others.”

I laughed and shook my head. “There have been no others. I’m innocent as fuck.” I sighed. Stupid, virginal, bookish, studious Madeline.

“That’s not a bad thing Addie.”

“I keep thinking I’m broken. Shouldn’t I have felt something? Even if I don’t like him?”

“No. if there is nothing there, then why would you Addie?” He replied.

“Anyway, I told him so. I let him down as nicely as I could and that’s where it went bad.”

“Bad?”

“He had a bet on me. I guess that he could get me in bed by the end of the week.” I replied, speaking about it again made me choke up. To him I’d been nothing but a bet and some pathetic money. I felt worthless.

I heard the leather on Lex’s steering wheel cover twist under the force of his tightening hands. He tried not to show a reaction, but I noticed it anyway. He pulled into the driveway of a nice house and turned the car off. “Guys are idiots.” He noted as he yanked the keys from the ignition.

“Not all guys.” I replied. “You’re nice enough. Most of the time.”

I wanted to dig a hole the moment the words left my mouth. We were talking about dateable boys, and Lex was not one of them. He was my authority figure, despite what I’d said about not being his responsibility outside of school hours, I wasn’t surprised he felt it. He’s my teacher, not a potential boyfriend.

“I’ve learned not to be a jerk. College beat it out of me.” He replied.

We hopped out of the car and I followed Lex up dimly let concrete steps. I could barely see, and as I reached the top one I lost my footing. Lex dropped down and caught me, his arm was around my back, I could feel the warmth of his skin on my skin. I looked up at him, our faces were close, too close for comfort. I could feel his breath on my cheek. If I had more gall, I could have leaned forward and kissed him.

“Alcohol and my steps are lethal.” He smiled as he steadied me on the deck. He took a step back. “You okay now?”

I smiled and nodded, but on the inside I was mushy mess. I could still feel his arm around me, his breath warm against my skin. I knew walking inside the house was a bad idea, and crossing a big line, even if Lex wasn’t aware of it. I followed him inside after he unlocked his front door. Instantly I felt at home. His house was like heaven to my musical imagination. All of the beauty I had been forced to repress presented itself around me. I walked over to a messoda poster on the wall and let my fingers drag across it. “You went to their concert?”

“Yeah, last year.” He replied. “It was amazing.”

I closed my eyes and tried to imagine what it would have been like to see them in the flesh. It was a dream for me, but Lex had done it.

“I’m so jealous.” I sighed.

“They’re going to be in Chicago later this year. Just after graduation in fact. If you want, we can go together.” Lex offered.

My heart skipped a beat. Deep down I knew that this was purely a friends thing, but my overactive slightly inebriated mind refused to acknowledge it.

“I’d like that.” I replied.

“About Ethan.” He said as he walked into his kitchen. “He’s not worth feeling down about. I know I barely know you, but I know you’re a cool girl and you deserve better than that jerk.” He walked to the fridge and pulled out a large bottle of juice.

“He’s your student.” I replied with a smile.

“Monday to Friday, in school hours.” He smiled back as he poured two glasses of orange juice.

“I should have known better. I wasn’t sure about him anyway, Greta just told me that I need to start branching out and she’s right. I guess I just have to still follow my gut.”

“Take life at your own pace Addie. There is no deadline for when you date, or kiss, or anything else.” He handed me a glass. “and you’re going to find someone eventually when the time is right.”

“Don’t patronize me Lex.” I whispered as I walked into the living room with the glass. “I may not know what it’s like to have a boyfriend, but that doesn’t mean I need reassurance.”

At least, not from the guy I’d met and instantly crushed on.

“I’m not trying to patronize you. I promise.” He sounded genuine.

“Sorry. I guess I’m just bothered that my first kiss was such a disaster.” I mumbled.

“At least the next one will probably be a marked improvement.”

“What if it’s not. What if I’m destined for a life of sad kisses.” The thought alone was terrifying.

“Again, not patronizing you, but that isn’t possible Addie. Besides, you’re destined to be a rockstar. You’ll literally have people falling at your feet.”

I sighed and placed the orange juice down on a coaster in front of me. I raised my eyebrows and for the first time since we’d walked inside I allowed myself to catch his eyes and hold them with mine. “I’m destined to be a doctor.”

“No, that’s what your father wants for you. It’s not your destiny, it’s not what’s in your heart.”

“Destinies aren’t real. Choices are real.”

“Then choose you.” He pleaded, his green eyes sparkled and he smiled.

I looked away, everything he said made sense. Ever since we had met everything I had told myself was out of reach seemed that much closer. Life was about choices, and if I chose myself my father would end up hurt. But if I didn’t choose me, I would be an empty shell of a person. It was a no win situation. Someone was always going to get hurt.

“It’s almost 11:30 I’ll try call Greta.” I mumbled pulling my phone from my pocket. I called. Her phone was dead and the call went right to voicemail. I looked at Lex and bit my lip. “Her phone is dead, could you try Jed?”

He pulled out his phone and called Jed, but by the look on his face I knew the answer. “His is off too.”

He pushed himself off the edge of the couch where he had been sitting and walked over to the front door to lock it. “I guess you’re crashing here then.”

“Huh?” I choked. “But um, Maybe you could take me to Greta’s she’ll turn up eventually.”

“No, it’s fine. The couch folds out. I’d offer you my bed, but considering the circumstances…”

“The couch is fine.” I interrupted him as a sudden air of awkwardness filled the room. “Could I maybe shower. I’m freezing.”

Lex looked me up and down then smiled. “Yeah, you can borrow a t-shirt and trackpants too okay?”

I nodded, I was excited at the prospect of getting out of Greta’s clothes. I’d felt hot and sexy for a short time, but it hadn’t been worth it. Lex walked away and returned a few minutes later with a white shirt, grey trackpants and a big blue towel. “I’ll make up the sofa bed.”

“Thank you.”

“It’s okay Addie.”

“Lex. Could we maybe look at my songs after? I brought my book. Ever since you mentioned it on Wednesday I’ve taken it everywhere with me.”

“Really? How many songs?”

“Four. They’re nothing special, some of them aren’t even finished.”

Lex grinned and nodded. “I’d like that. Let me show you where the bathroom is.”

I followed Lex down the hallway, he stopped by a closed door and then opened it. “Turn the water up hot. My temperature is a bit screwy, I’ve been meaning to get it fixed.”

“Okay.”

“You hungry?”

“A little. I haven’t eaten since lunch time.” I admitted.

“And you’ve been drinking.” He sighed.

“Mr Patronizer.” I warned.

“Rebellion is all well and good Addie, but you’re in my band. I wouldn’t want to lose you when I’ve just found you.”

I smiled and tried not to read more into the statement, but I couldn’t help but wonder if he meant for me to read more in to it. Our eyes met as he shut the bathroom door behind me. I let out a breath, unaware I had been holding it. My adolescence was shining through, the fact I was inside Lex’s bathroom went to my head. I placed the clothes and towel on top of the towel rail and walked across the floor to the oversized shower. I undressed and turned the nozzle around until it was on hot. The room filled with steam quickly and I climbed inside. The water washed away the remaining haze of tipsiness and by the time I turned it off and climbed out I felt completely clear headed. I dried myself off and pulled on Lex’s clothes. They smelt like him. I folded Greta’s clothes and after I spun my hair in the towel I walked from the bathroom and back down to the living room.

Lex had made up the sofa bed. I placed the worn clothes on the edge of the other sofa where my bag sat and pulled out my songbook. Lex walked over a few minutes later with a bowl of mac and cheese.

“Better?”

“Much.” I replied. “Thank you.”

I leaned down and reached into my bag. Racked with nerves I fished out the lyric book and held it out to Lex with one arm. He took it and smiled at me before opening it. I ate the mac and cheese like it was the first meal I had eaten in a month. It was absurdly delicious for mac and cheese.

“These are amazing.” Lex said a few minutes later.

“You think so?”

“Addie, I’m not in the habit of saying things just to make people feel good. You have a real talent and you need to start believing in it.”

“Okay okay.” I laughed, dropping my fork in the empty bowl. I stood up and walked into Lex’s kitchen. It was modernistic, minimalistic but I could still sense a feminine touch in the accents. The scrubbing brush, while frayed and in need of replacing was pink, a bowl of potpourri sat on top of the bread basket and an unused candle sat on the window sill. Lex wasn’t your typical manly man, but I could tell these were not things he had placed here. A woman had lived here at some point.

“I like this one about a torn heart.” He murmured. “It’s missing a verse though.”

I held back a gulp as I rinsed the bowl out. The song he was talking about was something I’d written the other night when I had been trying to do homework, except my mind had traced back to him. I’d used the songwriting as a vent, and once I’d written most of it I could focus again.

“Yeah. I was up late the other night. I kind of fell asleep before I could finish it.”

“Well maybe we can put music to it, and then figure out how to finish it?”

I nodded as I sat down. Lex stood up and walked out of the living room. I glanced around, his house was devoid of photos. I frowned, He hadn’t been kidding about his family disowning him then. He returned a little while later with a dark blue acoustic guitar.

“so what kind of vibe did you have in mind?”

“Rock ballad, slow, moody… but it builds.”

Lex grinned and nodded. “Looks like we’re musically in tune with one another.”

He hummed to himself then began to strum. Within half an hour the song had music. Lex picked the piece of paper up and then read over the lyrics.

“This song is like a story.” He whispered. “It has a beginning, a middle but no ending.”

I nodded, there was no ending because there had been no ending in real life to inspire it. I shrugged and looked at Lex. “I don’t know how to end it. I was inspired by a movie, but it had an ending I didn’t like, I didn’t want to use it.” I lied, but it was easier and less catastrophic than admitting the truth.

Lex’s lips drew into a thin line he picked up a pen and then wrote a line before handing it to me.

You are my reason to believe

in everything they said was just pretend

I sung it in the tune we had come up with. It fit perfectly. I took the pen and wrote another two lines.

You are the reason I’m free

Never have to lie to anyone again.

Lex smiled. “Just one more.”

I nodded and finished the verse.

Just as long as you’re here with me

I know I’ll be alright.

“Perfect.” Lex said humming it. “Should we run through it. I’ll harmonise.”

I nodded and listened as Lex began to strum. He looked at me when it was time for me to begin and I sang. It was strange knowing that this was my music, and this time we had worked on it together. It sounded happier than the one I had written in class, and I guess that had something to do with Lex.

We sung the last line and then Lex put his guitar down. He looked at his phone and swore under his breath. “It’s 2am.” He murmured. “We just spent two and a bit hours in a vortex of music.”

“It’s been over two hours.” I replied, slightly shocked myself.

“We should go to sleep.” He replied.

I nodded. “Yeah. No doubt I’ll get a worried phone call some time soon. I’m exhausted though so I might just say I found somewhere to crash.”

Lex nodded. “Don’t leave. I’m not trying to patronize you, but I know you’re safe here. After what you told me about Ethan I prefer this.”

“Thank you Lex, I appreciate the worry this time.” I replied.

“Night Addie.”

“Night Lex.”

I text Greta and let her know I was okay, and then as soon as my head hit the pillow I was asleep. It felt like no time at all had passed before my eyes were open again. My phone was vibrating on the coffee table and it was lighting up the dark room. I swiped to answer.

“Hello?” I grumbled.

“Where are you. I looked everywhere before I left the party. My phone died, I just got home. I am so sorry. One of the girls from school over heard about the bet. I feel like an ass.” Greta took a long breath after she spoke.

“I’m safe. I’ll be over in the morning okay. Ethan is a jerk, and i bet he won’t be the last… But I am fine.”

“Okay. I’m so sorry Addie.”

“Stop being sorry. Everything is ok. I’m sleepy, talk tomorrow.”

“Bye Addie.” She said before I hung up. I placed the phone down and turned on to my back. I stared at the ceiling for a while suddenly wide awake and super aware of the situation. Staying the night in my teacher’s house was all kinds of inappropriate, but then so was being in his band, and so was my crush.

I had crossed so many lines since school had started I was surprised I hadn’t tripped over the web I was weaving. I sighed and turned over. I was overthinking everything, I needed sleep.

I managed to fall asleep by thinking about all of the homework I had left to do. Unsurprisingly I was out like a light within a few minutes.