ghast.ly

/ˈɡas(t)lē/

Adj. causing great horror or fear; frightful or macabre.

--oo--

“Hey, bookworm. Let me guess,” Lea elbowed me slightly. “Your dad brought another woman in the house again, didn’t he? Come on. I am good at reading your face.”

It’s almost ten in the morning and we have been walking for almost half an hour around the campus, finding a safe spot where we could stay and talk about what happened yesterday. We used to stay in the library when we have vacant time, but today the library is not a safe place to talk about my personal life. And knowing that Mrs. Williams –the dinosaur-like librarian – was there, we can’t make even a single whisper, because if we do, we will be eaten alive.

I bobbed my head to say yes as we got to space at the back of an unused building, still wearing my gloomy face. She’s indeed good at reading my facial expressions. She can tell what things bother me just by looking at my face. That’s sheer ability.

“His room’s door was open last night and I saw them having sex. I felt like I was going to vomit when I saw the face of that stripper. She made me want to transform into something ferocious and tear her into pieces,” I grunt when I bent my knees to sit on the lawn and leaned my back against the stone cladding wall.

“Why don’t you rent an apartment in the meantime?” she paused and crossed her arms, facing me with such an interrogating face. “No matter how you tell your dad to stop, I know he won’t. And you can’t tell him to leave because it’s his house. So the best thing you can do for now is to set yourself aside, let them do what they want to do anytime they want, and focus on what makes you happy. There’s so much more than just stressing yourself about that.”

“I already have that in my damn head, Lea, but if I’ll do that, it’s like I am leaving a part of mom behind. That house is also my mom’s house. If I’ll leave, it’s like I am letting those crazy women take over my mom’s throne, which is not going to happen. I swear,” I rolled my eyes and sighed like letting out all the oxygen I inhaled for the whole time. “I know this sounds weird, but I’m still hoping they could be together again.”

“I understand you, but in your case, I guess it’s impossible. But guess what? Miracles do happen,” she muttered as she took something from her bag and gave it to me. “It’s an erotic book. I just discovered recently that reading books like this is exciting. You definitely must try this one,” she added.

I accepted the book out of my mind, still dragged to the thoughts of how I’m going to make dad change. When I realized what I was holding, I stared at it, scrutinizing the book cover critically, and then gave it back to her when my eyes settled on the man on the picture’s bulge.

“Books like this are not my type. I’d rather read horror books – or even children’s books – than those which emphasize sex, adultery, bigamy, and cheating. Look at those who read stuff like that. They thought having sex and losing virginity is like an adventure that can give them a certain kind of adrenaline rush,” I uttered. 

She bent her knees to sit beside me, “Eunice, I know you hate being like those other students who seemed liberated, but it’s not wrong to introduce ourselves to new kinds of stuff. We are not in high school anymore, and we are already twenty-two. Haven’t you observed that being too different from them is boring? Tell me, at least once, haven’t you thought what it feels like of having sex or be with guys?”

My body stiffened when I heard her questions. To avoid answering it, I shifted my eyes on my bag lying on my lap. I know she had a point – a good and honest point. In fact, I really did find my life boring sometimes, but it’s fine, and I can’t blame myself if I like living with it. I know my life is so different from others who enjoy going out at night, date guys they like, have one-night-stand with some hot guys, and get back home wasted, but those differences make me who I am, and I guess they define who I want to be. 

When my mom told me to reach my dreams for her, I know she wanted me to stay focused on my studies and never engage myself in the things that could lead me far away from where I want to go in life. I want to graduate with a Latin Honor and hope that maybe, through that, I will be able to see my parents smiling genuinely again.

I was about to change the topic and tell Lea about the book I bought last night when droplets of water went to where we were sitting, sprinkling like raindrops. We got up immediately and looked up in the sky, and narrowed our eyes when sharp rays of sunlight peeked through our lashes. The weather was fine, but where did those raindrops come from?

Rage poisoned my veins when I saw a man wearing a black hooded jacket standing on the roof of the unused building, shaking his waist and creating a wavy line of his pee to the ground. I couldn’t clearly describe how he looks because of the distance, but one thing I was so sure about him: he’s insane and I wanted to bury him alive.

I glanced at Lea and asked, “Now tell me, do we really have to introduce ourselves to new kinds of stuff?” I crossed my arms, giving her a you-are-wrong look.

She shrugged and pointed her finger to the man on the rooftop. “You crazy bastard! I am going to report you to the campus administrator!” she shouted and got an evil laugh from the guy.

“How does my pee taste like?” his voice echoed from above. “Sweet or salty?” The man then ran away, hiding from our sight.

I took some wet wipes from my bag and gave Lea some of them to wipe our skin. The stink of the crazy man’s pee made us want to vomit, giving us a pure headache.

"That crazy man is an alcoholic for sure. His pee stinks so bad," I muttered while wiping my face down to my arms.

"I don't want to know anything about him. What I want to know is how fulfilling it will be if I smash his penis using Thor's hammer," she said, gesticulated like smashing the air. "Let's get going now before we get bathed with pee again, or worse, with blood."

I stumbled a bit as she pulled my right arm and dragged me to the hallway. I tried my best to keep up with her but her steps were so fast, and given the fact that she’s long-legged, keeping up with her using my short limbs seemed impossible.

“Wait. Slow down,” I complained. “What’s with the rush?”

“I’m hungry.”

“Just slow down, okay? There is so much food in the cafeteria. There is no need for you to rush.”

“Oh, sorry,” she let go of my arm and then sneered. “I just need to hurry up a little bit because my cousin from France will visit us later and I need to buy something for dinner. Mom’s busy so I’m in charge.”

“So you’ll be cutting classes again,” I gagged while massaging my arm.

“Again? I never cut classes before,” her face contorted. “Do you want to come over tonight? I already permitted Nathaniel to be your boyfriend,” she boasted and acted like she’s cupid.

“For the record, I haven’t permitted anyone to decide for me regarding on when and to who I would give my hand, even to you. So, tell your cousin to look for other girls because I, Eunice Reyes, a Filipino-American of twenty-two years of existence, is already married to my room and my books,” I said, walking past through her.

“But he likes you so much. You are his type,” she insisted, walked fast until she reached my side.

“Lea, I already told you that I would never put myself into relationships, ever.”

“Don’t tell me that you are planning to remain single your whole life,” she paused and then gasped as she thought of something informative that would change the world. “Are you planning to...be a nun?”

“Whatever?” I rolled my eyes and grabbed her arms as we got to the entrance of the cafeteria.

Buzzes of people and the mouth-watering aroma of the cooked beef greeted us as she opened the door, making all of them turn their heads to us. Fault-finding eyes kept stabbing us, and gossips ran across tables. I could hear some of the boys in the corner laughing while staring at me.

“Hey, Ms. Virgin, do you want to have some fun tonight? I’m good at grinding. Let’s deflorate that tight hole with some moves,” the blonde guy with a nose ring shouted, then all of them at the table laughed. “This is a once in a lifetime offer. If you’ll go for it, I’ll bring you to heaven,” he added, sticking his tongue out and swirled it around his lips.

Controlling my temper, I inhaled so much air to ease the indignation quivering inside me. I tried not to stoop down to their level, but that guy kept mocking me with his offensive joke. I inhaled again, preparing myself for a lecturing session. Lea tried to stop me as I headed in the direction of the offender, but she stopped as I glared at her.

“Hey, Mr. Toro,” I don’t know if that was a good rebut or insult, but he really did look like a bull. “First of all, my virginity is not a weed or alcohol that you can use for pleasure. Secondly, what you just did is an unlawful act that falls under second-degree harassment which is a violation of the New York Consolidated Laws, Penal Law 240.21-240.32. If I were to think about this unlawful act of yours, I must say that you have to be imprisoned for fifteen days. Or if you are going to continue this arrogance of yours and still do that to me or any other girls, it will be elevated to Aggravated Harassment in the second degree, and you have to be imprisoned for a year with three-year probation and a fine of a thousand dollars. Lastly, I will never give my virginity to a guy like you. So, what were you saying again?”

Silence enveloped the whole cafeteria. I could hear nothing but the sound of the air conditioner. I hovered around, and I witnessed all of the people inside were staring at me like I did something wrong. I gazed back to Mr. Toro, still, his jaw dropped.

“Umm...it’s...it was just a joke,” he stuttered, frightened.

“It was sexual harassment,” I said, pinning my eyes to him and the others on their table.

They were left speechless as I had my way to the counter to order some food. And after a few minutes of staying in the cafeteria, Lea decided to get going, and I was left alone. I could still hear whispers and gossips with my name and the word “virgin” in it, making me edgy. As I stood up, I pretended I didn’t hear them and strolled outside with nothing but a veritable wish to vanish like a bubble.

I decided to go to the empty room in the very last part of the campus. It was solemn in there, and I liked how I can think peacefully when I spent my time cherishing the silent environment it has. Echoes of my footsteps were bending on each side of the room as I sauntered to the window, hoping to see the paper crane I glued on the window frame a month ago. Darkness covered the room, and only the light coming from the window illuminated inside.

The cold sensation of the iron frame crept to my fingers as I ran them across one point to another. The paper crane was gone, so I decided to just feel the air coming through the window. As I was in the middle of enjoying the damp breeze, a baritone voice broke the silence, making my heart pound like crazy.

“What is a virgin doing in this dangerous area?”

With fear gnawing at me from the inside, making me want to jump off the window, I slowly turned my head to where the voice came from. A ghastly man stood in front of me, staring at me straight in the eyes like he was hypnotizing me. Tattoos ran from his arms to his neck like patterns I wish I knew the meaning of. The corners of his lips raised, giving me a scary yet seductive smile. 

"You look...scared," he muttered with a sexy baritone voice. "You look delicious when your eyes screamed fear," he raised his left arm, then ran his fingers to my cheek, stroking my hair down to my shoulder. 

"W-who...are you?" I asked, my voice shaking.

He chuckled, "I am a mystery bound to be solved only through luscious ways." His fragrant breath kissed the skin of my face as he spoke every word sexily. "I can be your playmate if you want."