In the deep

If I could change one thing, it would be accepting to come to this school in the first place. Holyfield college, a strict religious school with a whole lot of disciplinarians and rules that were so annoying. One, girls did not wear pants. Two, a girl couldn't cuddle with a guy in public and not get a death sentence. Okay, the death sentence was a lie, but there would be a punishment for it.

Father had always wanted me to school where Christianity wouldn't be far away from me. He feared I'd get into a public university and become Jezebel. He was a strict Christian, which explained why my name is Hephzibah.

What was the first thing that came to your mind when you heard the name Hephzibah? The mother of Manasseh in the Bible right? Perhaps an aspiring nun. Tsk! You also thought I'd be a strict Christian like my father yeah? I was, but not as strict as my father.

My best friend attended Holyfield college and she said it was not as bad as I thought. Maybe I should stop being over dramatic and deal with the fact that I'd be going there for the next four years. Mother knew I wanted a university, but who was she to object when father had spoken?

Yep, that was how my house worked. Women did not have a say in decision making and there was no such thing as gender equality. Father said men were the head and women were under them just as men were under God. Mother was a submissive house wife because father didn't want her working or being independent.

He was strict!

I couldn't even use words like damn, fuck or shit. One time father heard me saying it over the phone and punished me for it.

My phone?

I was surprised I even had a smart phone because father said, "It's called a smartphone, but the people using it are dumb and it's a means for the devil to corrupt you."

He said and I quote, "Once you're too engulfed in your phone then it becomes your god which is a sin because the Lord forbids it."

Now you see why I was happy to be done with highschool, but then Holyfield college came and crashed my dreams of freedom. I'd still have no songs sang by Beyonce or Rihanna in my phone. I guess you already know why, father!

He says, "Hephzibah, you're 19 and should be aging with the Lord and not with the things of this Earth. Listen to Bible audios every day and night."

Okay, thinking about my father was enough. It was already driving me crazy. I'd not even spoken about him not letting me out of his sight. I was always at home like a prisoner.

"Hi, are you ok?" My new roommate asked, snapping me out of my thoughts. "You've been starring out of the window since you came." she paused and gave me a perfect dimpled smile. "I thought you were just watching your parents leave our dorm but I noticed you zoned out." she continued with her perfect Hazel eyes, shining brighter than the sun.

I only responded with a fake smile.

"My name is Hazel, I'm from Australia what about you?"

Ah, they named her after her beautiful, captivating hazel eyes.

"I'm-" I hesitated for a while and my eyes caught her beautiful shelf of books.

"Hephzibah! Her name is Hephzibah," my twin sister said joyfully, dragging her box into the room.

My twin sister, Debby was a bubbly miscreant and for some reasons I felt father loved her more, I didn't know if it was true, but If there'd be any prodigal daughter it'd be her. People usually think I'm not bubbly, I was, but I had a taste for freedom.

Debby obeyed dad, but she was kinda stubborn. Do not allow her sweet smile and melodious voice to deceive you.

"And I'm Debby." She continued with her right hand stretched out to-what did she say her name was again? Oh, I remembered–Hazel.

"Nice to meet you Debby and Zibah." She took Debby's hand and her box crashed to the floor, causing me to roll my eyes. "I can call you Zibah right?"

"Sure." I smiled and helped Debby with her box. The room was kind of beautiful to be our dorm room, compared to all those ones I saw on TV. This must be expensive. It was painted with milk and whatever color this was with a nice shelf for books. Beautiful windows and blindfolds that reminded me of when I used to peek at a very cute boy at home whenever he watered his plants. I never got to talk to him, sad.

Debby's bed was right beside mine covered with black and white striped duvet. The environment seemed friendly, nice weather and a nice closet. I had a feeling this might actually be nice and not as bad as I expected it to be.

"Yeah, sure. I'd teach you some Australian slangs," Hazel said to Debby.

They were already bonding, how beautiful. I was still a bit upset about being in this school so maybe I'd just keep to myself and never socialize with anyone.

Unpacking my box, I saw a little love letter my forever crush gave to me that almost put me into trouble when we were nine. Well, he wasn't really my forever crush, I stopped crushing on him the day that horrible incident happened.

I carelessly left the letter after reading it for the hundredth time that day. Dad was sweeping under the couch and I was there to help by collecting the important things that might have fallen under it. He swept out a letter and I knew the contents so I stood scared stiff.

"What's that?" He asked, inching close to it.

"Leave it Dad, I'll just trash it. It's probably one of my rough sketches," I said in a fretful manner, trying to hide the cold feet I was having. This man was so good at knowing when there was something up my sleeve.

"What's under your sleeve?" He eyed me suspiciously. I Told you he always knew when something was up my sleeve.

"D-dad it's just a rough sketch, I'll dispose it." I simpered and reached for the paper, but I was too late because he got it before me. My blue eyes must have betrayed the fear I tried to hide. He was pulling it open before opportunity presented itself through Debby.

"Dad! Some Mr McCoy is on the line." She held out the phone in her hand and signalled for me to take the paper from him, but that was going to be impossible. She handed him the phone with a glass of juice.

"I'll keep that for you on the table." whispered Debby, while taking the paper out of his hand. Quickly, I ran up to tear a rough sketch and squeezed it with all my might before gaving it to my twin to help replace it.

"Thank you." I whispered and continued sweeping like nothing happened. Lord knows what father would have done to Blake and I. He would have marched up to his house and caused a scene.

"Did you see the bracelet Mom gave to me?" Debby asked, snapping me out of my trance. I checked the little pocket of my box and handed it to her.

The letter meant a lot to me even if Blake clearly had no interest in me anymore after what dad did to him. I still kept and read it every once in a while.

The letter says-:

Hi sunshine, I've been wanting to tell you how much I love and want to marry you but I'm just a shy average kid that crushes on the most beautiful girl with the prettiest blue eyes I've ever seen. I'd love to share my juice box with you tomorrow in school.

Love, Blake.

I smiled at how he sounded so mature in the letter and not like some average 9 year old he called himself.

I'll put this in a picture frame someday.

I laughed at the 'I want to marry you' he wrote. Where was he now? He left me, why? Because he was a coward! It wasn't exactly his fault. It was my father's fault!

I had no boys around me because of him. I loved my freedom and it was the reason he preferred Debby to me. I was the type that protested even when I'd be punished.

The handle of the door twisted, but I locked it with the keys so the person couldn't get in.

"That must be my best friend." Hazel sang and stood up from her bed, adjusting her pink shirt and drawing up her black skirt.

Was this one of those movies I go to a college I hate and fall in love with the friend of my roommate? Please Lord, let it be so.

Finally, I was falling in love and it was with Hazel's best friend. I wondered what his eyes look like. I bet he'd fall for my blue eyes, no one resists them.

Sitting up right and adjusting my black unfitted gown, I wished I had something more beautiful than this. I wore a beautiful smile and looked at the door like I was going to jump on whoever I saw coming in.

"Hey!" Hazel and the weird looking girl said, cutting my joy short. I thought this was going to be like that Wattpad book, after.

I face palmed myself when I remembered boys were not allowed in the girls dorm and got a confused look from the girls.

"I wasn't expecting you, I thought it was Ava," Hazel said.

"I just decided to check up on you and your new roomies," the girl said, walking elegantly into the room. She smiled at me with her baby doll green eyes. "I'm Mandy."

I shook her hand so as not to leave it hanging.

"Hephzibah." I smiled and got back to what I was doing.

She stood there in this weird looking faded pink dress that showed her curvy features.

"Debby." My twin sister shook her.

"Nice to meet you all," she said, looking at me and it felt like she was stripping me naked with her eyes. I disliked how she stared at me, it felt so unclean.

She flipped her red hair and turned for the door.