Amelia

Posie was cremated a day later. Whenever William would look at me , I would feel his disappointment. Looking at him made me feel guilty , it reminded me of what I did . When we went home together , no one said a word. Susan and William were in their own worlds and so was I. When we got home , I stepped in our room and undressed . I didn't notice William come in , he stood and watched me removing my dress.

Suddenly William kissed me and pushed me against the wall. My dress was already off so I was only in my undergarments. He ripped my underwear and put his finger inside me . When I went to kiss him , he turned me around so that my back faced his chest . His one hand tugged gently at my hair making my neck arch. He pushed one more finger inside me.

" William , I don't want to .. I'm not in the mood "

He said nothing but his grip tightened on my hair that it became extremely painful. " William please " I said again , " where were you when Posie was dying in the tub ?" he asks.

I stiffened , he removed his fingers out of me and his hand left my hair . He caressed my neck gently and I mentally assure myself that everything is fine.

" Answer the question " he says and that's when I smell the alcohol on his breath. " William , you are drunk , we will talk later " I say calmly and move towards the bed. He suddenly comes behind me and tightly holds me by puting his one hand on my breast and other on my stomach. " How did she die Amelia" he says again and his hand squeezes my breast so hard that I wince. I start struggling and try to get out of his hold but he is so strong that he doesn't even budge. His hands tighten around me . I scream as he squeezes my breast again aggressively. I feel as if the hands on my body are of a stranger . This isn't the guy I fell in love with. I immediately start crying ,sobbing .

"Please William , I'm begging you " I say. He turns me around so that I'm facing him " Mom told me , she told me everything ." He says and pushes me hard on the bed. I cry harder when I see the look on his face . I scoot backwards trying to move as far as I can from him until my back touches the headboard.

" William , we will talk about this tomorrow . I know you are hurt but so am I " I say

" What did you do to her?"

" What? "

He grabs my ankle and yanks me down until I'm beneath him. I move my body and try to get away from him. My body starts shaking with sobs. " Please , William .. please let me go, please don't hurt me , please " . He says nothing and snatches my wrists, pressing them against the mattress above my head . He looks entirely different , his eyes dark . I knew William would get aggressive when he was mad but he never sexually assaulted me.

I try to push him away with any part of my body , when I scream he covers my mouth with his hand and I bite down hard. That's when his head comes crashing down on mine , once , twice , thrice and then there's darkness.

...

When I wake up , I feel something trickling down my eyes . My hands automatically goes towards it, my eyes widen when I see the blood. That's when I remember everything , William forcing me, touching me. He ruined it , he ruined everything between us , I knew I can't forgive him for this . I quickly get up and the first thing I see is William Sitting on the chair just in front of me.

I flinch when I see his dark eyes . Tears fall down my cheeks but he says nothing. He watches me for a minute before grabbing my upper arm and dragging me downstairs. I start struggling but it doesn't do anything so I give up. I spot Susan on the sofa reading a book. Her eyes observe William and when she looks at me her eyes widen. She quickly stands up and strides towards us .

She looks at William questioningly.

" Tell me how Posie died mom " William says. He looks at me with so much digust, it makes me cringe.

" She left her alone in there , some man came to meet her and she went downstairs to see him ,leaving Posie all alone." Susan says. My eyes water , I see the fear in her eyes and I understand what she is trying to do. I know if William finds out about the real truth ,he would never forgive Susan. I know it's not her fault but I can't help but pity her. She might lose her son and William might lose his mom .

" No , I didn't " William interrupts and asks me " where were you when she was in the bathroom ?"

" I was downstairs but I "I don't expect the next moment until his hand comes smacking me on the face so hard that I fall on the floor .

" She was two years old , you could have asked mom to look after her . You know I was actually right about you whoring around wearing those short dresses . You fucking disgust me " he screams

" Just listen to me , I'm not lying . I did go downstairs but I told Susan , I told her to look after her"

"Stop lying ! Stop fucking lying. She was taking your side you know . She was telling me not to hurt you." he says

" You know I'm glad she died , I'm glad she didn't get to see the real you . I can never forgive you for this , both of you. " I say pointing at William and Susan.

Posie was diagnosed with down syndrome , it didn't make me love her any less but my love only increased. I always made sure to take care of her , to look after her , to make sure she wasn't in any pain.

I watch as he clenches his jaw , he yanks my hair and I scream as he starts pulling me towards our room. I shut my eyes and wish that he doesn't rape me , if he does he would break me , kill me from the inside and I know he wants to do that now. I try to grab something but he pulls my hair so hard that I stop , I scream at Susan to tell the truth , but she doesn't. She comes running and I see the tears on her face . She yells at William to stop , she says it can be handled differently but I know William. I have spent 4 years with him and I know how he gets when he is mad but this is different , now he won't hurt me but kill me slowly just like he thinks I killed our daughter.

He pushes me in our room and locks the door . I struggle in his arms when he starts tying my hands and legs with a wire. I stare at him as he goes to the bathroom and fills the tub . He is going to drown me . My heart starts beating so loudly that I fear he may hear it. A few minutes feels like hours when he finally comes out of the bathroom. He grabs my upper arm and I start struggling to get out of his hold.

" I'm going to make your life hell. You killed my daughter now look what I'll do to you."

He drags me inside the bathroom and suddenly my head is dunked in the water. It doesn't bother me for a few seconds but I start losing oxygen. A voice inside me screams for one breath , just one . I start struggling . I feel vulnerable , I'm tied and I'm being drowned. I feel that he might kill me but I know he will eventually pull me out but surprisingly he doesn't. I start crying , my chest hurts , my insides burn. I want it to stop , I want to yell , I want it to stop.That's when I realise that this is how Posie felt . This is how vulnerable she felt and I did nothing.

I start feeling drowsy , my mind gets hazy and suddenly I think that this is how I die . I told him the truth but he didn't believe me , he choose to believe his mom and maybe I would have done the same. My eyes starts closing and I welcome the darkness but William pulls me out before I can go unconscious.

I cough again and again, I shake with sobs , it gets so loud that hearing myself cry makes me cry even more. I take in as much oxygen as I can. The truth was , I didn't think William would ever hurt me physically . I thought he loved me too much to hurt me but I was clearly wrong.

" That's how Posie felt , you bitch " he says and that's makes me cry harder.