TEN YEARS LATER...

“I can’t believe you’re actually going to this.”

I’ve decided to ignore my brother’s remark as I quietly watched the primitive display of the passing buildings, along the old streets of Paris, through the car window beside me. We are currently on our way to attend a very special concerto in one of the biggest music halls in the city. And this night is a special booking…

Because it is the music concert that I’ve been dying to go to for months now… It’s a musical for Monteverdi’s Eighth Book of Madrigals.

“How come you’ve only gone to Monteverdi’s shows? What about my own concerts when I’m actually your own family?” my brother nagged on me, still holding the exquisite booklet that includes the details of the show. But I only tuned him out of my ears. How come?

Well ever since I have finally regained my sight nine years ago, I’ve started to become so obsessed with his music. I would go to anything that was just related to Monteverdi’s works. Anything… Be it a musical, a movie, a seminar, or exhibit. As long as I read Monteverdi… I’d go wherever it is.

“Don’t get me wrong, Taiyo. I'm truly pleased that you’re fond of the classical genre. Not many people these days would truly appreciate it as much as we do. But it’s been so many years already, and not even once you’ve ever tried to come and watch my solo recitals,” Kevin went on.

He was right, though. I’ve never really come to watch him play live. He’s a pianist and a composer. And being the only musical prodigy in the family, it was a big deal that all of us would go to his shows to support him. Except me, it’s just that…

To be honest, I’d never really gone to Monteverdi’s music concerts just to listen to his compositions. Though I do like them all now. I’ve actually grown to admire the pleasant sound of his musical pieces since the moment I've first heard all of them. However, I wasn’t actually a big fan of classical music in general. I’ve only shown interest in Monteverdi’s masterpieces because of a certain song in one of his published works…

“The Nymph’s Lament”... Or rather, “Lamento Della Ninfa”, in its original title.

It was the only main reason why I keep going to anything related to Monteverdi. Just because of that song… Because of the girl who sang that song ten years ago…

And like tonight, I was still hoping maybe, at this event. Just maybe. I’d finally find her there. Maybe tonight, I’d finally have a face to put on that beautiful voice that has stolen my heart away in that distant memory from my past.

Filled with these thoughts, I eventually came to my senses when we finally stopped just at the front of the theatre. As soon as I descended out of the car, I was immediately deemed impressed by the red carpet cascading through the stairs that welcomed us towards the entrance of the establishment. I felt my heart pounding from excitement as I appreciated the lavish foyer with my brother trailing me behind.

“It’s packed, huh?” I soon heard him saying.

“It’s a rare concert,” I explained to him, “It’s been almost four years since they’ve held a Monteverdi’s tribute for his eighth book of Madrigals.”

“You’re always very knowledgeable every time you talk about Monteverdi. It’s really unnerving that I could almost see Aria in you when she fangirls over boy bands she kept telling me about,” Kevin retorted, referring to her daughter.

“I guess, you could say we’re kind of similar on that level,” I just shrugged, walking past the lobby of the building.

I heard my brother gasped at my words as we took the elevator up to the hall where we were supposed to sit. As soon as we’ve settled on our own designated chairs, Kevin spoke to me again.

“What is really with Monteverdi, Taiyo? Why do you keep going to his tribute concerts?”

“Want me to really tell the truth?” I raised a brow at him and Kevin fervently nodded back.

“Because she might be here,” I told him in a short dismissive note.

“Who’s she?” My brother frowned at me but before he could even probe for more, the lights finally went dimmer and the curtains started to rise. Someone at the back tried to silence him in a shushing sound and I bit back a smile when my brother glared at the person behind him.

As soon as we began to indulge ourselves in the passionate and soulful piece after piece of Monteverdi’s beautiful music, I felt my anticipation arising when I knew they were going to play the song that I’ve been so obsessed about all this time. I held onto the arms of my chair and leaned a little forward as I waited for the female singer to belt out the first note…

“Amor…”

But as soon as I heard the unfamiliar voice coming out of her, I slowly felt my heart retreating away…

It’s not her.

“Amor…”

“Amor, dove, dov'è la fè. Ch'el traditor, Ch’el traditor... giurò?"

As I sulked down on my seat in deep dismay, I found myself empathizing with the lyrics of the song. The sorrowful mood of longing hit me really hard in the chest as I felt the sinking feeling of disappointment swallow me down to sadness. It’s still not her. That girl… Ten years...

And if not for the voice, or that beautiful song… Where in the hell will I find her?

How?

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