Chapter Seven

The first week after Stede left, Eli clung to Hollis like suckerfish attached to a capsized boat. Endless conversations ensued about Stede's mysterious background, his nom de plume, and the lack of a history. Everyone had history, even children, albeit under their parents' names. The possibilities rambled around her head until she'd go crazy. Who was Stede Marrow? Where had he come from? More importantly, had he spoken one word of truth in the time she'd known him?

Erline stopped by the trailer every day after work, insisting the Chatty-Cathy crew could muddle through for a time without her, and much to the woman's credit, she didn't offer an opinion about Stede's sudden departure, not even a snide, 'I told ya so.' Not that Hollis would have heard her in those first days, much less had the ability to respond.

Eli had to return to Painted Moon the second week. One hundred Red Angus had to be moved to a larger grazing pasture and the rigorous routine of ranching didn't allow him to stay longer.

Between long, daily walks into Barrows or forgotten moments collapsed in a lounge chair outside her trailer, the hours passed, one dismal day rolling into another. Nights were another matter altogether. She couldn't look at the bed, much less sleep in it. Stede's face surfaced wherever she looked—the bathroom mirror, the kitchen window, even the luminescent moon overhead.

She hated herself for loving him still, especially after the cruel words he'd flung at her. Most women would vow to hate him through all eternity…after they cut off his balls. But hating Stede would be like hating herself, and no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't convince her pathetic heart to listen to her brain. She'd never see him again, she knew that, and somehow, she had to come to grips with this thought, forget about the beautiful man. Yeah, right, bullfrogs will morph into pink elephants first. Well, no one had to know, not Erline or Eli. Whatever she harbored for Stede in her heart, she'd keep hidden and hope it would fade away like a bad nightmare.

Her worst nightmare came true during week three of her self-imposed isolation. After a restless night's sleep, she woke Saturday morning to sheets of rain pouring through the living room window, drenching her and the sofa. When she reached up to close the culprit, nausea roiled in her stomach and followed her all the way into the bathroom. Exhausted after thirty minutes of dry heaves, she crawled back to the wet couch and cursed her black luck. No, please. This can't be happening!

She didn't know how much time had passed, and didn't care, when a loud knock at the door broke into her misery. "Hollis, open up; unlock the door."

"Go away, Eli."

"Go away? Hell, no."

She heard a groan…hers. "I'm not feeling good. Come back tomorrow."

"I'm not coming back tomorrow. Are you gonna open the door or do I have to break it down?" He gave the flimsy screen door a swift kick to let her know he meant business.

"All right, already, I'm coming." A wave of dizziness held her hostage as she stumbled toward it. If she looked as terrible as she felt, Eli wouldn't rest until he got to the bottom of it. Besides, she'd never been able to fool him. He seemed to have a sixth sense when it came to her. She slammed the deadbolt back, twisted the knob and pulled the door open.

"God, you look awful."

"Thanks for that; wouldn't want you to sugarcoat anything." Staggering back to the sofa, she crumpled into a heap. "I think the worst has passed."

"You're as white as bread."

"Really? I thought I looked greener than Kermit the Frog when I looked into the mirror…after heaving my intestines out."

"Do you think it's the flu?"

"Yeah, the kind that lasts a long time—a really, really long time."

"Maybe we should make a run to the ER, get you . . . what did you say?"

"You heard me."

His look of sudden realization skittered across the small space separating them. "Are you certain? I mean it could be—"

"I'm sure. While lying here wishing a serial killer would walk through my door, I tried to pin down the last time I had my…well you know what I was trying to pin down."

"Stop talking like that, about killing yourself! And how long has it been?"

"Long enough that I can't pin it down. And before you ask, yes, we took precautions. No one is more surprised than me." As if talking to the ceiling, she lowered her voice. "Must have been that night at the cemetery."

She caught Eli out of the corner of her eye and took note of his confused expression. "The cemetery? Hmm. And I thought we hung out there to catch fireflies, play a little juvenile Hide 'N Seek, slug down a few beers, dance on graves—"

"I think the slugging down beers one must have been my downfall."

"Sex at the cemetery…who knew it could be so excavating, er, I mean exciting."

"Do be serious. I'm so dead and so scared shitless here." She threw an arm over her forehead. "What am I going to do, Eli, huh? I'm such a loser. First, I fall in love with someone who doesn't even exist and, next, I get myself pregnant."

"You can't get yourself pregnant, Hollis, and Stede does exist just not as . . .."

"Let me finish that for you. Not as we know him or who we thought him to be." She slapped her forehead. "I'm the most stupid girl in the world. I should just shoot myself, save someone else the trouble."

"I told you not to say things like that; don't ever say things like that again."

"Erline won't let this one go. And Viney, Adeline and Miranda, their tongues will shrivel up like prunes from over use."

"Why do they have to know?"

She raised herself up on an elbow and looked over at him. "Are you kidding? I work there."

"How are you going to go back to work if you're throwing up every morning, or sick all day long?"

"I don't think morning sickness lasts all day." She shook her head and chuckled. "That's why they call it morning sickness. Besides, I have bills to pay, you know, food to buy."

"Come home with me to Painted Moon."

Tears sprang to her eyes. "Oh, Eli, what would I do without you?" Handsome Eli with his golden hair, gorgeous dimples, and green eyes that sometimes looked blue, like now, against the denim shirt hugging his well-muscled chest. "Thanks, my knight in shining armor, but I can't do that."

"Yes, you can. There's no one to stop you." He stepped toward the sofa, plopped down and placed her feet in his lap. "Until we can figure out what to do, what to tell Erline, it's the perfect solution."

"But your dad, what will he think? What about the ranch hands? Think I want them talking about me like I'm some trailer trash you dragged home?"

Anger flashed in his eyes. "Curly, Pervis and the others wouldn't dare speak one word about you and my dad knows . . .."

A long pause stretched between them. He loves you, Hollis, Eli loves you. "Knows what?"

He ran a hand through his short hair. "How much I care about you. Anyway, he's not like that." A smile curled the corner of his lips. "You've met him a time or two, and once you get to know him better, I think you'll like him. He can be a grumpy old man when he sets his mind to it but he's all bluff and bluster."

"I know as much about ranching as I do babies. You better think about this."

"I have, and I think you'll like ranch living. Nothing more beautiful than the sun coming up over the vast prairie or the moon standing guard over the buttes at night. It's serene, peaceful."

She chewed on her thumb. "What about babies?"

His bright eyes glossed over. "You'll make a great mom, beautiful girl, I know that."

"I don't know, Eli."

"Well, I do. Are you well enough to throw a few things together and make the short journey?"

She clutched her belly. "I think so, if you're sure it's the right thing to do."

"Never been surer of anything in my life." The blue eyes pinned her with an indefinable emotion, one she hadn't seen in his eyes before. "You go pack and I'll make a call to Erline, tell her you need to get away for a spell."

She slid from the sofa, walked toward the bedroom and pivoted around by the hallway. "Stede's motorcycle is out back. If anyone in the trailer park finds out I'm away, it won't be for long." Her voice lowered to a whisper. "I know he isn't coming back but I don't feel right about letting someone steal it. He loved that bike."

"I'll toss it in back of the truck and store it in one of the sheds."

Twenty minutes later, Hollis walked from the trailer, closed the door behind her and joined Eli in the truck.

He looked over at her. "How about giving me one of your smiles; you know, the one that slays dragons?"

Dang, if he hadn't pulled one from her. "Ain't no such thing as dragons."

He started the engine. "You sure? You'd be surprised at all the wild critters hanging around the ranch."

"I'm sure but thanks for making me smile, Eli. It feels good."

He took her hand and coasted down the driveway. "Then I'll make it my mission to make you smile every day."

Goodbye Stede. Hello new life, hello little baby.