Stairway to Heaven

Chapter 01

Mia Celestine Alegre

Drop of tears sliding along my cheeks, with questions how I be able to fix this mess? I feel so heavy, it's pounding my chest. Chaotic mind, rushin' feelings. I cannot think properly. Yesterday, it was fine. I was really beyond thankful that I've had great moments with the people I love but in one snap, my world had been destroyed.

As I saw my boyfriend having a sweet gestures toward my friend, they are teasing each other, throwing jokes and laughing together as if they are the sweetest couple on Earth.

The moment I heard the news of what had happened to my parents and the time, my boss told me that our company is already losing its grip resulting into a sudden close.

All of that happened in one day, I can never imagine this. It was more likely a nightmare for me, I cannot accept this! This is just... Cruel, a taste of too much cruelty on my life.

“Condolence.”

That's what people say to me as they saw me staring blankly at the two coffin next to me. I was an only child, how can they leave me this easy? I didn't even achieve my dream yet, it was still in the process!

I'm only twenty years old, I am still trying to figure out what my life would be and this happened? I mean, is this the plan for me? It sounds unfair, I didn't even achieve something that my parents should be proud of. I'm still in the process of my building my own career.

“Here, eat this. You need to at least gain some energy for tomorrow's burial.” My aunt offered me a food, they are all busy talking to all the people who step their foot inside this hall. My parents, they didn't harm anyone, but why this thing happened to them?

I saw in my peripheral vision that my ex-boyfriend and he's current girl are here and walking towards my direction. I looked away, this is a torture. The other day we were okay, I knew he loves me because he even kissed me, deeply as it is the most precious thing he knew to himself. I know in myself that we love each other but why is this? All of a sudden he loves someone else? Can someone please explain it to me because I can no longer understand. Do I lack of something? Am I not enough or what?

“Mia.”

My heart beats rapidly as I heard the masculine voice of him. It is the voice I knew for so long but something change, it wasn't as sweet as before. The sparks might be already gone. Damn. I cursed beneath my breath.

“Mia, I'm sorry.”

Their hands are intertwined, it was supposed to be me. I deserve that hands! That's my property for a long time but why... Why is it holding someone's hand? This is just unfair.

“W-what are you doing here? Leave. I don't want to see you here!” I exclaimed.

“Mia, let's talk first. Shall we? Please.”

My lips pressed together. “Leave.” I declared.

But instead of leaving, he looked at her side and whispered something on her and dragged me outside the hall.

“Ya! Let go! Let go of me!” I hissed, yet he doesn't seem to pay attention, he continued to walk away and I just found myself standing near the sidewalk. I saw some vendors shouting their products.

“Mia, let's talk first.”

I laughed, talk first? What for? To tell me that he already find someone else, and they're both genuinely happy? Oh! great! I already saw that! No need to tell me.

“Okay, fine! You find someone else, the reason why you broke up with me, right? The reason why you just throw out our relationship for five long years? Right?” I never tried to blink my eyes even once, my eyes are focused upon him.

“That's not the case.” he started, he is playing with his hands. I know that! He's trying to tell me something horrible!

“Tell me. What do I need to more? Is she pregnant or what?! Tell me Ethan. Tell me the fucking reason why you cheated on me!” I gritted my teeth, angry features begins to develop throughout my whole system.

“I'm in a relationship with her...” he paused, intimately stared at me for a moment. I tried my best to chin up. You got this Mia, you're better than this. “For almost two years.” he continued.

I blinked twice, what? Wait. Did I just heard it right?!

“You're lying.” I faked a smile, oh come on. That isn't the case!

“I'm sorry.” he pleaded.

His eyes are full of guilt! I want to slap him over and over until I release all the emotions that are lurking inside me.

“I'm sorry, Mia. You know that I love you, right?”

“Is that how you love?” I asked, biting my lips and trying my best to hold out my tears from falling.

“It's too painful, Ethan.” soon as I said that, I felt the hot liquid slowly touching my face.

He was just there, maybe waiting me to dry up my tears. Sure, it's my fault. I let him hurt me, but why is that? I still love him!

Moments later, he walked away from me. I just stared at him slowly disappeared from the horizon. I restrain myself to not let an emotion to run towards him. But that's not what my heart wants. There, I put all the courage to run and asked him a question.

“Why it can't be me, Ethan?”

“Because you don't deserve this, Mia. You deserve someone who will show you how beautiful the world is. A person who will love you better than I can because things aren't supposed to be like this. I was thankful for the days we had shared together, those moments will always be here.” he pointed out his heart.

“But Mia, I know that I'm a wrong person for you. Let me become a right man for her. I can no longer choose you this time, so let me be happy with her. I will leave you now so that I can stay with her because I know that sooner or later, you'll find someone else who will truly love you, every inch of you. You're a precious gem, Mia but the only thing is that, you aren't mine to keep.”

My gazed fixed upon him, I cannot even move my feet, it was stuck and my tears continuously falling.

I felt his hug, he wrapped his arms on me. He was playing with my hair giving it a slight pat.

“I loved you, Mia. But this time, you need to let me go.” he whispered on my ear. And the moment I can no longer feel his touches in me, I know that we're now on separate ships setting sail for a different journey of our own.

Because the saddest part of love is that, it is not something you can force to give. Maybe, he can always tell that he still loves me but sometimes heart just couldn't lie. Maybe his heart longs for something I can never give. He loves me, but maybe he loves her more than me and that's our difference.

"I am sorry for giving you promises I only broke in the end. I am sorry for closing this chapter of our story, and I cannot make it until the last one. But I only wish that someday, you'll find happiness in someone's arms, finally not hurting with this scattered moments from your heart. Mia, you deserve the world and I cannot give it to you." he looked at me in the eye maybe giving me his final blast.

I used to look at him with eyes full of love and it was always made my heart flutter, it was warm. But I never had thought that there will come a time when looking at him would be the hardest thing to do for I know he was the reason of the my heartache. Never in my wildest dream did I think that I'd be able to muster up the courage to just look away while he was walking out of my sight.

He looked at me, one more time, maybe finally giving me his goodbye.