He needed to calm down.

That much he knew, that he needed to calm down but then everything was irritating him and causing him to be restless, even the simple task of climbing up the stairs annoyed him and rather than just walk up the stairs, he could not help but stomp his way up. He paused and sighed when he got to the last stairs, rubbing his temple with this thumb and index finger. Everything was a mess, he was used to chaos as he was always the bringer of it, but this was something else, it started with Lyra and ended with Lyra. Ever since she got here, ever since the burden of the year of Osyron came, it was all a mess.

Hopefully, this would be the last. He would have to do as his uncle had suggested; for him to go look for another Khione and not put all his eggs into one basket. He walked down the hallway, making his way to his room where Lyra was, as soon as everything here was settled, they would go out across the kingdoms in search of another Khione, he didn’t have time on his side, and just as Xanth had worried about; how long would that take him?

He walked into the room quietly and stood by the doorway, she laid on his bed, her face soft in sleep, her servant girl sat on a stool beside her bed, holding her hand tenderly and watching her Lady’s face with care and worry, the physician stood by the corner, arms crossed and his eyes on Lyra, and although his body was here, Ryder could tell that his mind was not.

“How’s she?” Ryder asked, drawing everyone’s attention to himself. He took a couple of steps into the room but did not come close to the bed where Lyra was. The physician walked up to him, his head bowed low in respect.

“The bleeding is under control and she is asleep now. Just a couple of days’ rest and the Lady would be on her feet again my Lord.”

“Hmm.” He grunted in response then directed his next question at the servant girl. “Where is Iris?”

She hurriedly stood up from the stool and bowed slightly to Ryder, before answering him. “Probably in her room, my Lord. She has not come in here after she left after you.”

He hummed and nodded his head then took a couple more steps closer to the bed. The maid and physician stepped back, giving enough room and space for him. He stood awhile and watched her with an expressionless face. She was important to him, dearly but that was only because of the fact that he had a need for her, and she had to be alive and well to trust him completely, but she was making this task difficult for him and she was beginning to get into his head a lot.

He sighed and turned his head away, he had his own way of disciplining people into compliance and submission but each time he thought to do so, Xanth’s words would come into his mind; he had to learn to control, to make her trust and love him, but recently, he felt like he was under her own control, unconsciously.

“Let me know if there are any changes.” He said before walking out of the room. He had to see Iris.

She sat on the bed wearing nothing but a wrap-around nightdress with a cup of wine in her hand, she looked towards the balcony as the curtains swayed, welcoming the gentle breeze blowing inside. 

“Why have you come here?” She asked when she noticed Ryder standing by the doorway. “Finished with your precious Khione?” She sighed and downed the cup before casually throwing it across the room.

Ryder walked in and sat on the bed beside her, he placed a hand over hers but she removed it from underneath. “Iris you should understand why I have to do this.”

“That is the sad part,” She choked back her tears. “I do understand and I have to bear with it.”

“So why are you…?”

“Because it's hard to just watch and not be able to do anything, Ryder.” She faced him now and he could see that she was hurt. He sighed. “It’s hard to watch you love someone else.”

He frowned when she said that. “I do not love her.”

She sighed and looked down at his hand. “I know, I’m just…” She allowed her words to trail off.

She looked at his face and leaned forward then kissed him, slowly and passionately, her hand on his neck and her thumb stroking the underside of his earlobe. He responded and kissed her back, his hand held on to her wrist as she deepened the kiss. He didn’t want to touch her intimately because he wasn’t in the mood, but he didn’t want to upset her further either so he just went with it, hoping that it would end with just a kiss.

She broke it off but kept her forehead on his, she stroked the underside of his earlobe continuously. “It has been a while.” She spoke softly in a whisper, she took hold of his other hand and lifted it slowly, placing it on her breast then squeezed his palm. She moaned.

“Iris,” He called, he wasn’t in the mood for this but he also did not know how to tell her so that she would not feel dejected again.

“Shh…” She hushed him with another kiss, this time more passionately than the last, pushing him down on the bed. She got on top of him and without breaking the kiss, she began to remove her clothes. It was a simple nightdress so it was easy to remove and she wore nothing else underneath.

She broke the kiss and sat up on him, allowing him to have a good look at her naked self, she took his hands and placed them on each of her breasts then her hands went down on him, she struggled a bit with his clothes before her hands found his cock.

He swallowed when she touched him and she gave him a quizzical look. He wasn’t hard. “What’s the matter?” She asked with a smirk and then began to stroke him until he was hard enough to penetrate into her.

She moved up until she had positioned the head right at her opening where her wet clits kissed him, they both gasped as she guided him into her, slowly until she sank down with him fully inside of her. Then she began to move.

His hands slid down and his thumbs dug into the sides of her hips, controlling her movements as she bounced up and down on him. He watched her as she watched him, her facial expression soft and needing, she gasped and moaned with each bounce, and her fingers scrapped across his chest. But he just laid there, watching her. They had had sex multiple times in the past, wonderful sex that would have them both screaming and moaning loudly and clawing at each other for more, but today he just did not feel anything right now. He knew he owed her, so then if not for him, then for her at least he would fake it.

He closed his eyes and moved his hips upward to match her movements, thrusting into her from below with hard strokes. She pressed her palm to his chest and her moans grew louder with a hint of pain and pleasure.

“Ryder…!” She moaned a plea and he opened his eyes but without slowing down and the sight he saw almost drove him over the top.

Her eyes were soft and pleading, and her expression melted which almost made him cum immediately because it was Lyra he saw riding him, and only then did he begin to feel. Her every touch turned him on even more, one hand dug fingernails into his chest and the other palm pressed against his lower abdomen like she was trying to get off of him, but he would not let her. He watched her parted lips, quivering and panting. She begged him.

“Please Ryder…” She gasped, threw her head back, and then slowly rolled it forward and let out a moan that caused him to tingle all over.

His hands slid back to grab her butt cheeks, massaging them tenderly as he thrust into her repeatedly. And although she was on top of him, he controlled both their movements. He groaned, the two molds of soft flesh on her chest bounced temptingly and he wanted nothing more but to have them in his mouth. He slid one hand up her back and pressed her body closer to him, causing her to place her hand on the bed on either side of his head, giving him access to her breasts.

He bit and suckled on a nipple as his thrusts became faster, going deep into her, his hands held her hips in place while he drilled into her hard and fast, but he still could not get enough. She screamed in pain because of his hard thrusts and the torture his teeth were giving to her nipple, but she could not deny the pleasure in them.

They climaxed together, and when they came, they came hard, with Ryder moaning out her name.

She placed her hands on his chest and pushed herself up from him, his member still twitching inside of her, and when he opened his eyes, he met the cold stare of Iris and his body went cold immediately.

“Lyra? Really Ryder? You were thinking of her this entire time?”

He just laid there staring at her and without saying a word, he had unconsciously moaned out Lyra’s name at his release and he could only imagine how hurt and angry Iris must be now. She stood up from him and his member slipped out of her, falling limp on the bed, and then she walked briskly into the bathroom.

He sighed and laid there without bothering to cover himself. What was wrong with him?