Let's just go home

"Rebel it's not funny anymore. Do you really think this is funny? Come on, you have to understand things," I try to explain to him why he's here. "Okay, fine, I don't have any idea why you're here, under the same roof as mine, I'm sure it's not for a vacation, but I'm not gonna ask you why, I know you want to keep it private but I hope you cooperate with us---" again, he got my third kiss, this time longer than the first and second kiss. For no reason, I let him as my tears fell from my eyes.

"You really are disrespecting me as a woman," I said unable to look at him in the eyes. "Do you really want this? Do you really like kissing girls without their permission, or you're just used to getting girls that easy? You think I'm an easy girl too? And you think that makes you more of a man?" I don't know where this long patience of mine will take me but I'm really working on it, I'm not a person who easily get mad, so it's understandable that I can still keep up with him despite of the things he'd done to me, which I really don't like.

"Hey, you're making me look so bad right now, I thought you’re liking it, me kissing you, you're not even complaining," more patience Mary Elizbeth, just think that God is challenging you. “You just made me feel so bad.” I doubt it, because right now, I know for sure, he’s just mocking me.

My heart is about to explode, our faces are one inch away from each other now, "I told you owe me one kiss last night, I just took it. What's so wrong with that?" He's talking to me like we're about to kiss again.

I close my eyes. And then...

"Come with me," I said as I held his hand. Good thing he just let me, and he just keeps up walking downstairs with me. "Mom, we're leaving for a stroll," I told Mom who's busy talking to someone over the phone. She just nodded and smiled at me.

"Where are you taking me, young lady. Are you going to punish me? Hoping that is one sexy punishment tho," he devilishly smiled at me. He's really unbelievable, he likes to do things his way. He doesn't even care if it's too much already for someone. He removed my hand holding his and immediately went to a cigarette vendor.

He smokes.

I was stunned for a moment. This is the first time I'm seeing someone smoking near me. "What?" I know this time, he's irritated. "I thought you brought me here for a smoke," that's not my plan and that wasn't even in the plan. He laughed at me while he blows off the smoke right at my face. I pushed him away as I cough. "Give up now? I'm smoking hey!" I walked fast and I know he'll follow me.

As I walk he suddenly grabbed my hand. I had the courage to get the cigarette from his mouth but he's too attentive he made sure he'll be able to avoid my hand, well he succeeded but I slightly touched the lighted tip of the cigarette and it stings "ouch..." I silently complained as I check the tip of my finger, it's a bit swollen.

"Fuck. Give me your finger," he's not just smoking but he cursed too.

And when he noticed I'm not gonna let him check my finger he threw his cigarette somewhere else, "I told you to give me your hand!" for a moment I got scared of him, his eyes darkened and I can see that he's really mad now. "You know you're making me sick of you, you really have your ways huh?" I shake my head, I don't understand him. "You can't get me that way, remember that." He spat.

Confused, he left me here standing. My heart aches, and this is the first time I felt it, does he really hate me that much? But he kis---nevermind. I shook my head, don't think about it Mary Elizbeth.

My knees got weaker but I tried to walk and follow him, I walk slowly while he's not minding me at all following him. I wonder if there would be a day that I'll finally understand him. I know there's something in him, there's something that he cannot really say. I'm not forcing him to tell me anything but I really wanna make him feel that I'm just right here for him.

"Hey, my finger's really okay, I'm sorry for what I did it's just that I'm really willing to be your friend," he stopped walking and it made me bump on his back. My nose hurts more this time than my finger.

"Elizbeth, what should I do with you? You think I wanna make friends with you?" I nodded. He pulled his eyebrows together, I tried to reach for his eyebrows, but he caught my arms and he started twisting it a bit.

My eyes bug out. I winced. I'm not sure if he's already that mad but the way he's twisting my arm, I am sure he can make worst.

"It hurts Rebel," I complained this time.

"See? I can hurt you. Stop trying so hard." He lighted another cigarette and blow the smoke off at my face again. I close my eyes and tried not to inhale the smoke coming from his cigarette. "I can hurt you more than this," I just smiled at him.

Sometimes lonely people are those trying to be strong outside even if they're weaker inside.

Silence took over. Until I felt my tummy rumbled and I think he noticed that too. "I'm hungry, let's eat?" I held his hand but he slapped it off. I just said okay under my breath, feeling defeated suddenly.

Tears forming on the side of my eyes... "Uh...maybe you want to go back home instead," my tummy made another sound, I can feel my cheeks heated up because of that. This is too much, I've embarrassed myself too much for today.

"You're hungry," he said so on point. I shake my head. I don't want to cause more embarrassment to him right now. I'm sure he hates me more than he hates me before.

"We can just go back and eat. We're not yet far from there," he gripped my hand. "Wait, wait..." I was about to walk the opposite way when he threw his cigarette and pulled me with him. Him still gripping my hand.

"Your hand, it hurts gripping my hand," I tried to tell him but it seems like he's not listening at all, "Rebel your hand---" I was caught off guard when he suddenly intertwined his hand with mine.

And that foreign feeling made me stop thinking about all the embarrassment I’ve caused him.

"Better now?" He asked seriously.

I don't know how we got in here. Tho I'm not living in the city, our province has a lot to offer when it comes to establishments and buildings.

"Where do you wanna eat?" He asked.

"Anywhere you want, I'm coming with you," I smiled at him.

"Stop it, you're unintentionally seducing me," his eyes darkened while his jaw clenched. I pouted and look the other way, I want to apologize but I know for sure he won't like it if I will.

I'm not even seducing him, not even unintentionally. How can he treat me like this. I'm not even doing anything on purpose.

"Fine." He cursed, I know but I didn't hear it clearly. He got my hand again and we were welcomed by a sound of a crispy chicken eaten by one of the customers in a popular fast food restaurant.

I don't usually go to any mall, unless I need to buy things for school, and mom is a great cook, so I'm not really used to eating fast food usually seen in malls. "You don't like it here?" I look up to him, I just realized how tall he became, he used to be as tall as I am when we were kids, now I stand until his shoulders only, a bit under it to be exact.

"I'm fine here," I smiled at him, he looked away. He always look away whenever I smile at him.

"I don't have cash with me right now, do you have?" I tried to check my bag, and realized I don't have my wallet in it. Oh great! This wasn't the same bag I usually use, it must be there, in my bag for school.

"You're not going to tell me you left it, are you?" I bit my lower lip. "I knew you were a trouble," I step backwards. I didn't notice it because we were just walking since earlier, and we just got here, he can't blame me for that, if I knew earlier, we could have gone back home instead.

"Wait up here---"

"We can just go home, I'll just eat at home---"

I tried to but he's just really...

"Shut it!" He really has short bad temper, "you wait up here, I'll just withdraw some cash," I just nodded while looking at my sneakers.

"You wait up here whatever happens, stop acting like a kid," I look up to him this time, I blink for so many times, what did he just say? I'm a kid when he's being hard on me?

Mary Elizbeth, it's okay, you have to understand him, I told myself trying so hard to get my patience longer than before. It's so hard to put up things with someone like Rebel, but I can't just give up on him like this. Maybe he thinks people gave up on him easily, his mom probably told him to have his vacation in our house when clearly, he doesn't want to. Maybe he felt so unwanted that's why he's so hard on every people he meets.

"Okay, I'll wait for you, whatever happens," I told him and breathed deeply.

My stomach hurts already, it's been few hours since he was gone, and the mall is close to their closing time, how far is the ATM machine? There's a lot of ATM machine here.

"I'll wait for you, whatever happens," remembering what I've told him, I found myself going out of the restaurant and out of the mall. What could have happened? My heart pounding too loud and fast.

I tried to search for him out of the mall but he's nowhere to be found right now. I get my phone almost have thrown it because I realized I don't have his number. As much as I wanted to call Mom, I can't, I don't want her to worry so much.

"Rebel!" I searched everywhere, calling out for his name.

My feet hurt, my stomach hurts, but I must find him. It's getting late night already. I think I should call my mom this time, I can't do it alone, I really can't find Rebel alone.

I immediately called my mom's number. "Mom..." My tears began flowing like waterfalls. "I can't find---"

"Shhh..."

"Hello? Mary Elizbeth? Glad you called! I was about to call you... Where are you and---"

"Rebel..." I said under my breath. He got my phone and ended the call. "W-what happened to you and why...why are you covered with b-blood..." My hands are trembling as I reach for his bleeding lips, with this are my tears that won't stop from falling too... He flinched when I touched all scratches from his face. It looks really bad.

"Let's go home," he said in a weak voice as he snaked his arm around my waist, "please don't ask anymore, let's just go home, please…" and as much as I wanted to ask what happened, I remained silent as I helped him walked better.

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