23. I'm Not Sherlock Fucking Holmes!

"And if you are ever going to have other people trust you, you must feel that you can trust them, too - even when you're in the dark. Even when you're falling."

- Mitch Albom

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The rest of the day was slow and painful, I had to sit through class after class with rage heating up inside me. Every little thing was annoying my entire being, I felt like at any given moment I was going to snap. Especially in Mr. Hipp's class, if one more person said one more comment regarding the French Revolution I'd probably beat my head against the desk until I went unconscious.

It didn't help that Rylan was in the class either, I wanted nothing more than to march over to him and confront him but I wasn't one for causing scenes, primarily because Mr. Hipp cared way too passionately for history so I'd be sent to the office before I even reached Rylan.

I was just so angry. I was angry that he lied to me, he even tried to convince me it was just some random name Axel had said drunkenly. The thought made me even angrier and then there's the fact that no one would tell me what was exactly going on here, which probably frustrated me the most.

My life was turning into some type of Scooby-Doo episode, I was going around searching for clues and answers like I was Sherlock Holmes, well guess what?

I'm not Sherlock fucking Holmes!

I'm tired of pressing and begging people for answers that they're not going to tell me anyway. I don't understand why various gangs would want me. It's not like I meant that much to Rylan, or Axel for that matter, if I did they would tell me what was going on.

When the bell rang I stayed glued to my seat and glared at Rylan. I was almost certain my tongue was bleeding from biting down so hard on it, trying to stop myself from coming unglued.

Rylan gave me a confused look, probably wondering why I wasn't moving.

"You coming Buttercup?" He asked, nodding his head towards the door.

I wanted to say 'screw you' but it came out as 'yeah' instead. I grabbed my bag, that I now felt like setting on fire because Rylan gave it to me, and followed him outside to his car.

Looking at the car that he drove just confirmed the whole "Rylan being the Ex-leader of Black Spades" thing like Clayton had said. How else would you explain how a seventeen-year-old would be sporting a car like this without a job?

The drive back to Rose's house was long and the atmosphere was uneasy and heavy. I had so many things I wanted to say, it was almost overwhelming. I spent all day waiting for this moment, rehearsing what I was going to say to the both of them, but somehow the words got lost in travel from my brain to my tongue.

"You lied." I cut through the tension, looking out the window.

"What are you talking about?" He asked, his voice sounded a little more high-pitched than usual.

"About Faye, you lied," I said looking over at him.

"You lied to me," I spoke, staring at him accusingly.

Rylan's grip on the stirring wheel tighten, so tight his knuckles were turning white from the stress. I waited for him to say something so I could retaliate but he never did.

"You know, I expected it from Axel. That's just who he is, but you? I thought we were friends." I decided to say.

"We are friends, Mia." He said almost immediately.

"Friends don't lie straight to another friend's face!" I hissed.

"Oh, like you lied about joining the book club?" Rylan rebutted.

"Our school doesn't even have a book club, I checked." He snapped at me.

"Since I got here it's been nothing but lies! And somehow they all revolve around you!" I snapped back.

"And you know what? Yeah, I did lie about the stupid book club! I asked Axel to teach how to fight so I could protect myself!" My body started shaking with both anxiety and rage.

"Why didn't you ask me?" Rylan asked taken back.

"Well let's see Rylan." I started.

"Baseball star or gang leader? Who would YOU ask to teach you?" I asked him.

"But now I know, you were the leader of Axel's gang." I forced a laugh.

"Maybe if you were honest with me, I would have asked you for help." I pointed out.

Rylan clenched his jaw tightly, his hands were still clamped around the wheel and his foot pressed down on the pedal of the gas, giving the saying "pedal to the metal" a new meaning.

I sat back in my seat as he rode the bumper of a truck in front of us dangerously close, he was swerving and swaying past people at a speed that made me reach for my seat belt, jerking it slightly to lock it against my body.

"I wanted out, Mia. I didn't want that kind of life." He spoke, his eyes glued the road.

"Axel always could handle it better than I could." Rylan continued, speeding faster down the street.

"Rylan, slow down," I said cautiously.

Panic spread through my body like a wildfire, my chest started heaving and I was sure I was going to start hyperventilating at any second.

"Do you think I want to lie to you? Cause I don't." He stressed.

"Okay, I believe you Rylan, I'm sorry! Please! Just slow down!" My voice rattled in my throat.

As if Rylan was possessed, he quickly shook his head and looked down at the speedometer and realized how fast he was really going.

"Shit." He cursed, instantly slowing the car down.

"I'm sorry." Rylan reached a hand out to touch me but I jerked away quickly.

"Don't touch me," I told him, calming my shaking body.

"Mia-"

"Don't" I cut him off.

I leaned my head against the headrest and closed my eyes, trying to focus on getting my breathing and heartbeat back to normal.

The rest of the trip home was silent other than the sound of my rugged deep breathes every once in a while. I don't know what came over Rylan but it was enough for me not to want to ride with him anymore.

When we arrived at the house I jumped out of the car as fast as humanly possible and bolted straight up to my room. I heard Rylan call after me but I made no attempt to stop my pursuit to my bed.

When I made my way up the stairs I was surprised to see Axel leaning against his door, as if he was waiting for me. I rolled my eyes and scoffed at him before walking into my room. I wasn't in the mood to talk, especially to him.

But of course, Axel didn't care and followed me into the bedroom and I quickly made a mental note to start locking my door again.

"Got something else you want to lie about?" I asked taking my shoes off.

"What?" Axel's eyebrows furrowed.

"I don't have the energy for this, please leave," I told him, jumping on my bed.

"How about no." He said, coming closer.

"I know about Faye," I informed him.

Axel stopped walking and his eyes darkened to a shade that resembles black.

"What exactly do you know?" He pressed.

"Sorry, I can't tell you." The words came out like venom.

"Don't play games with me, Mia." Axel's jaw tightens along with his fists.

"What? You don't like the words that you and Rylan have been shoving down my throat?" I knew I was playing with fire but I couldn't stop myself.

"And then you act as if you like me, tell me honestly Axel, do you really like me or do you enjoy toying with my emotions cause you know you can?" I asked him.

"On second thought, don't answer that. I wouldn't believe you anyway." I snarled.

I watched as Axel lost control and punched the wall next to my door, I sawdust from the drywall fly across the room leaving a smoke trail. I looked at his hand and saw it had gone through the wall.

My mouth gaped at the damage he had caused.

"This has nothing to do with how I feel about you," Axel shouted.

"And I'M playing with YOUR emotions?" He gave me a look of astonishment.

"You're the one dangling me by a string." Axel narrowed his eyes at me.

"Bullshit!" I cursed.

"I've been nothing but fair to you! I even forgave you after you said all those horrible things towards me." I shouted.

"Everything I've said was because I had to! Do you understand that? Mia, I had too!" Axel growled.

"I shouldn't even be here right now! I'm supposed to stay away from you, but I can't! Can you get that through your head? I can't stay away from you Mia." His tone changed considerably.

"Why are you supposed to stay away? Stop leaving me with more questions than answers!" I shouted back at him.

"Mia, you're going to have to trust me, I'm trying to protect you." He said, walking closer again.

"That's the thing, Axel, I don't trust you. You haven't given me a reason to trust you." I threw my hands up.

"Remember I told you about my father?" He asked, throwing me off.

"Of course I remember," I told him, not understanding what that had to with anything.

"You are the only person I've told that story too." He spoke looking at with intense eyes.

"You've got to believe I would tell you about this if I could Angel," Axel whispered.

"But there are people watching us, Mia. They are always watching, waiting for someone to make a mistake." He told me.

"I promise everything I've done is with reason and I promise- Mia, look at me," Axel demanded.

I obeyed and looked at his dark eyes and tried to understand what he was saying the best I could.

"I promise when it's safe, I'll tell you everything." He spoke softly.

"Is my life really endanger?" I asked, Clayton's words echoing in my head.

"Yes."

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