The Edge

The Bridge, Dream, and Reality

The Bridge:

Standing on the edge of the 5th street bridge in Northern Amoza, I look down at the foggy water, then back up and behind me. People walk past, not even a glance my way. No one cares. I turn my back on the people behind me, let the air out of my lungs before taking a step forward. Before I could finish my step, a vision flashes in my sight, Rhylie, Hope, Kaily, Aaron, and Liz are screaming at me to stop. They're begging me to stay, and to not do it. I shake my head, the vision leaving my space. "If they cared, they'd actually be here, saving me." Again, I take a deep breath then fully release it before stepping off the bridge. My body drops through the air, finally splashing into the river below, I relax, allowing it to take me with it. The current takes me further, and further in, pulling me to the bottom. My chest feels like its being crushed as I let water into my lungs. Salt burning my lungs and throat as I go unconscious, then bliss shortly after.

Waking up, I hold my throat and chest, gasping for air. Aaron holds me tight, trying to ground me. "As long as I'm here, I won't let anyone hurt you, baby... I love you." I sob, as my emotions from the dream flood my head. He holds me still, letting me get some of it out before I tell him what happened. I catch my breath, looking up at him I slowly start, "I tried to scream for help, but before I knew it, I was underwater... My chest imploding." I sigh, as I hold back some tears, "I felt useless, and no one cared that I jumped...None of you guys came when I called...I jumped..." Aaron holds me closer, "That could never be true baby..." I start crying again, I wish I could see that as the truth, I wish I felt important. Aaron tilts my face up to him so I'm forced to look at him, "I know you don't think it's true, but I would give anything for you to be happy."

Later on that day, I force myself out of bed, about three hours after Aaron went to work. He wouldn't have gone today, but money is getting tight and he won't let me work. I sigh as I sit down at my desk and open my laptop. It instantly turns on and I enter my password. Going onto Sofa Novel, I start typing out a story about greek gods coming to earth to fight a human battle. I finish the chapter, revise it, then hit publish. I lean back in my chair and stretch out my whole body, a few joints pop as I do so. Standing, I push my chair back up to my desk, and I stretch again while yawning.

In the shower, I let the hot water beat down on my back, before I sit down in the tub. I sit there with my eyes closed and part of the dream resurfaces, and I cry. I climb out of the tub as if I was drowning, I cough hard and lay on my side on the mat. Minutes pass and my body calms, I stand slowly and turn the shower off. I shake as I dry myself off and get dressed.

Dream:

The next day I wake up to Aaron kissing me all over my face, and sweetly smiling at me, "Let's go on a mini-vacation with everyone." I sit up and look at him in shock, "Are you serious?", he nods in response. I do a little happy dance, smiling, I tell him yes. Aaron stands and pulls me to my feet with him, and gives me a big hug. I then look up at him, gently holding his face, "I love you", and I kiss him. He picks me up and I squeal, he smiles again softly. To be honest, I've never seen him this happy, it almost doesn't feel real. He sits me back down and we both get dressed up to go out and pack a few pairs of clothes along with other necessities. Aaron and I sit at our mini bar and have a small breakfast, just to hold us over until we have lunch with the others.

In the car, Aaron puts on my favorite song "Never Too Late" by Three Days Grace, and we both sit in silence, enjoying the car ride. He grabs my hand out of nowhere and holds it, making me slightly blush. Aaron seems to notice and chuckles at me. "You're so adorable Eli." I simply shake my head at him, not knowing how to take the compliment. The next song that comes on is our song that I wrote for him, it's called "Us". I didn't sing it of course, because my singing could kill a whale. Looking over at Aaron, I notice his eyes glazing over, and I kiss his hand that's holding mine. He gently smiles again, and I feel a flutter in my stomach.

Arriving at the restaurant, Aaron comes around the car and opens it for me like a gentleman. "Thank you", I say slightly bowing at him, taking his arm after he shuts the door. We walk in together, we're the second ones there, Hope got there first. Hope greets us both, and hugs us, she's like a daughter to me. I always make sure she has everything she needs, even if I can't afford it for myself. Aaron and I sit down next to Hope, we all sit and wait for the others. It's not long before they all arrive. Kaily sits on the other side of me and Aaron, then shortly we all order.

After we all finish up eating, Aaron bends down to tie his shoe, but a split second later, pulls something from his pocket. He looks up at me and simply says, "Marry me?", I stutter over my words in shock of the suddenness of this. "O-of course", I answer nervously and a tear slips from my eyes. Everyone around us cheers as Aaron smiles, and kisses me. I look around me, quickly dropping my head and covering my face as I can no longer hold back the emotions. Aaron hugs me though I'm sitting down, "Why are you crying, babe?" and all I can slip out is, "I'm so happy."

Later, we all arrive at our small hotel at the beachfront and get checked in, and settled for the night. We unpack our things and put things up before we lay down for a little while. A few hours pass and Aaron decides to text the group chat asking if anyone wants to hang out at the beach until the sun comes up. I smile looking over at him, and play hit him. Heading to the bathroom I grab my swimming trunks and his, Aaron gets up and follows me. We both change into our trunks, every once in a while, while he's changing I stare. He seems to have noticed and winks at me.

Coming back from the beach, it's around six in the morning, and we both shower together, not wanting anything but touch. Stepping in the shower, we stand there holding each other, not wanting our vacation to end just yet. I slightly tense as I get a cold chill through my entire body, remembering the dream. Aaron instantly notices and says, "Did the dream come back?", I nod slightly, and he rubs my bare back trying to comfort me. A few minutes pass and the dream exits my head. I look back up at him and apologize to him and he shakes his head queuing there's no reason to be.

Done showering we dry off, and head back to the bed. I lay down facing him, wanting to be held until I fall asleep. Aaron lays close as possible to me, and does just that, holds me, and whispering good things until I fall asleep in his arms. I love him so much, I hope I never lose him. My heart is full from the day that happened before us, and I just wish it didn't have to end yet.

Reality:

I wake, choking on the water surrounding my cold almost lifeless body. No... No! That couldn't have been fake! I try to scream for help, but I can't push any air out, my lungs are filled. I'm too weak to move and too cold to. Damn it, what did I do? My feelings that I had before I passed out again flood my brain. Why didn't they love me? Why am I not enough? Why did he get tired of me? Do they hate me for existing? Or was I too annoying or clingy? Fuck, I miss him... Why did he leave me? Why did all of them? I just wish things turned out different...

A few more minutes pass, and I can't stay awake anymore, the pain overwhelms all of my senses. Then something nudges me, I open my eyes for a split second, a shark. I can't fight it, and I can't breathe. So, I close my eyes and allow myself to relax, and die. I give up fighting. My head pounds from the depth and lack of oxygen, causing the delusions earlier. If life only could be that way... I wouldn't be here. Memories of all the bad shit that happened in my life flash before me. Being bullied, by family, and people in general. Being abused, physically and mentally, and emotionally. Alone was what I felt more than anything in my life... Alone and like a burden to anyone. Including him.

My pain starts to fade along with the vision, I start to feel as if I'm being lifted from my body and the water. The next thing I know, I'm staring at my lifeless body drifting with the current. Sharks start to circle the lifeless body below me, and I smile content. My pain is finally gone.

I HOPE YOU GUYS LIKED THIS SHORT LITTLE BOOK! IM SORRY IT WAS SO SAD! REMEMBER, YOU'RE NEVER TRULY ALONE, THERE'S SOMEONE THERE EVEN IF YOU DON'T FEEL THERE IS. WE ALL HAVE A PURPOSE, AND IT CAN BE SIMPLE OR COMPLICATED BUT THAT IS UP TO YOU. MY PURPOSE IS TO HELP OTHERS, AND I TRY DOING THAT THROUGH MY WRITING. ILL ALWAYS BE HERE TO TALK, EVEN IF YOU DONT KNOW ME. ILL TRY. THANK YOU FOR READING!

HAVE A GOOD DAY/ NIGHT!