"AH!" I CLOSE MY eyes and sob silently while shielding my head using both of my arms and curl my knees up to my stomach to avoid getting hurt in my sensitive organs. I curled my body in this wet dirty bathroom floor as I accept their kicking and punching. I just bite my lips to fight back the loud cry that I wanted to scream.

My body hurts in every part. It's aching and every hit of their hard shoes on my body, I know it's leaving painful marks. I'm crying because of the unbearable pain. I wanted to shout, scream, ask for help and told them to stop.

I can't take it anymore... please...

"That's what you get bitch!" I heard Selena said and give me one powerful kick at my shoulder that made me scream before they stop.

I whimper in pain and just let the tears fall from my eyes while it's still close.

"Serves her right. For always stealing the attention." Another girl who I don't know said and they laugh.

"You don't ever learn, do you? Years and you're still this pitiful." Catharine said and crouched to take a better look at my face. She even take a handful of my hair and pulled it to see my face.

I open my eyes and our gaze met. She smirk at me.

"Look. Your face is so busted. Always pathetic and loser. Nobody interacts with, and nobody cares with." She is blonde and has a sexy petite body. Really beautiful even she's full of make up, but her brain has a very low capacity. I can bet my whole life that she can't even solve a simple math problem.

"Please... stop it. What did I ever do to you?" I ask her in teary eyes.

"I just hate you, simple." She stands up and sign to her friends. "Girls."

They are 7 in total, but originally they are just 3. Catharine, Selena, and the girl I still don't know. 2 of them shoot me with water balloons and I cover myself with my hands then they throw flour at me.

I cough and try to remove the flour in my face so I can open my eyes and breathe.

"I wanna say you must learn your lesson but given that it is you, I'll just waste my saliva." Catharine said and they bark in laughter before storming out of the bathroom.

I let myself cry. In pain, embarrassment, hopelessness, and pity on myself. I don't like this, I don't want this. What did I ever do to deserve this? I never hurt anyone. I never done anything bad to anyone. So why?

I stand up and felt the stinging pain in every parts of my body. I look at myself in the mirror and all I can say is... Pitiful. I'm so pitiful.

I have little cuts and scratches on my face but I'm covered all over by flour. I look down at the floor and saw the phone leaning on the wall. I took it and put it inside my bag that's resting on the sink and then start to fix myself.

I can't go out looking like this, right? I'm at school. I'll get scolded by the faculty staffs.

I wash myself, rinse my body and face using the water. I'll wince every time I'll rinse my skin because of the scratch or wound there. When I'm done cleaning myself, I change clothes using the spare that I'm always carrying and I stare at the mirror.

I see a pale black haired girl who has blue eyes with thick eyebrows and eyelashes, straight nose, and full swollen red lips, she has a petite body and tall height. She look fierce and scary with some scratches on her face but... it's my reflection.

A tear slide from my right eye and I smile to myself. "Look at you... you're scary..." I said in a whisper voice. "You look good."

The door opened and I look down immediately before I peak to see who's the person who enter the comfort room. I saw a girl who I recognize as one of my classmates. She look at the whole mess before she look at me with a questioning look on her face.

"What the hell happened here?" She ask me.

I look down more and hide my face using my long straight hair. "I..."

"They hurt you again?"

I look sideways and nod my head.

She sighed. "Why..."

I didn't answered so she just go inside one of the cubicle and I took that opportunity to go out.

I am Ennaira Alistair. No friends, an outcast, a completely nobody but everyone knows. I am quite famous, specially when you need someone you wanted to beat up because you had a bad day.

I walk at the hallway with head bowed down. I can feel the student's stare and weird glances at me and their chatting about me but I refuse to look, because... I hate looking at people's eyes. But I feel a familiar gaze so I look up at a direction and our eyes met for a second before I look down again.

"Pathetic." I heard from that person.

Yes. I am pathetic. You know it.

This is Corina University, I am at my 2nd year, 20 years old. I am a type of student that they called a teacher's pet and a class' maid. I have all the jobs by myself but I still have good grades. I am average, you can say.

I have no friends. It's either I'm just too weird, introvert, or it's because the cheerleaders has heated eyes for me. No one wants trouble, you see, and I seems to be attached with trouble.

"Pst! Shit! Come here!" Catharine called.

I am currently erasing the board, I'm just done on wiping the window earlier. Today is my group's day of cleaning the classroom, all the classes are done and it is me, my group of cleaners (which is Catharine included), and other students who wanted to stay is the only students are here in the classroom.

"Hey, Shit! I'm calling you!" She shouted in annoyed tone and I feel something hard hit the back of my head.

I glare at the board and my hold on the rug tighten.

I am the shit obviously.

I turn around to look at her. She's sitting on her chair with her feet on the desk in front of her. "What?" I ask.

She raise one of her brows and smirk at me. "I got kicked out of the volleyball team today, I am pissed."

What does it have to do with me?

One of her friends grab my arm and drag me in front of Catharine, then Catharine kicked my leg and she stand up.

I hissed in pain and crouched to hold it but one of them took a handful of my hair and pull it so I will stand straight.

"Close the door." Catharine ordered and one of them got to the door and close it and the windows too. "Undress her."

My eyes widened and I look at my other classmates for help but they only look away. Catharine's friends laugh and started to undress me.

I shook my head and cried immediately. "Please don't!" I fight and tried to keep my hands on my uniform so they can't undress it but they are many so all I can do is cry and beg them to stop.

Catharine ruined my blouse and remove my brassiere to see my boobs and she played with it.

"Ahh! Please!" I cried and saw one of them filming it. "Please! Stop!" I wiggled my body and fight but three of them is holding my arms and hand and stilling me in my place.

"Are you okay?" Someone ask me when Catharine and her friends is gone after doing that to me.

Still crying and pitying myself, I nod at her.

"Why are you letting them do that to you?" She ask more to herself or her friend.

"Annie, just stay away from her." Her friend told her.

That day I stayed in the classroom longer than usual even everyone is gone and it is only me who's there. I cried hugging my body at the corner until it's all dark.

Why they are doing this to me? Please... can't someone save me from this? I'm so done... I can't... live like this anymore.

"I'm home..." I declared when I enter the house and I directly go to my room to lay and rest my body and my mind.

"Tss! The lazy princess is home! Hibernating on her room again!" My auntie Beth shouted just outside my room.

"Get her off to bed! She didn't do anything to help in this house!" My uncle shouted back.

"Hmp! I'm so done with that kid! So lazy and worthless. I don't know why your mother is keeping up with that lazy ass."

"I don't know too." My uncle replied to his wife.

"Ennaira worthless and lazy." My cousin echoed.

Tears pooled at my eyes and it falls unstoppable. I keep my sob and breathe slowly so I can control my cry to be unnoticed, but it results to made my heart heavy and my throats hurts.

Please... somebody stop this pain. Please...

I sob silently and breath very slowly while letting my tears fall.

I'm so tired.

After some while, I'm not sure if it's hours or what. Someone come inside my room and sit down on my bed because I feel the part of the bed at my back dip because of her weight.

"Enra? Are you asleep?" It's my grandmother's soft voice.

I didn't answer her even though I'm awake.

"Are you so tired because of school? The dinner is ready. I know you're awake."

I put my hand on my mouth to stop my sob that I felt growing. My heart is getting heavier and my eyes blurred as tears fell like an unending falls. I slowly exhale and cleared my throat.

"I'm not hungry." I said in a firm voice.

"I'll leave you food on the fridge, if you're hungry later, eat it." She said and get up then I heard the door of my room closed.

I let out a little sob so I can free my heavy heart but I know I can't go all out. I have to keep it to myself.

It's nothing. It's just nothing compare to the past.

This is the kind of life I have. The kind of life I'm enduring almost all of my life, since I was a kid. Nobody knows my real pain, even just my pain inside. All of it, it's just all inside me.

No one wants to know.

No one cares to know.

But everyone is asking.

Save me...

Funny.

My phone beep a notification and I look at it to read what is it. "Your referral has been sent."

More funny.

No one can save you but you.

Morning came, I enter Jenny's Restaurant. It is a famous 5 star restaurant in this town. I sit at the center part of the resto and order their breakfast special.

"Your order will be here in a moment." Said by the waitress and bow before going to get my order.

I sip on the water resting on my table and saw a woman looking at me. She's not so far from my table.

"Hi!" She smile and wave at me.

I smile back at her. "Hello."

"You're regular here?" She ask.

"Yeah..."

"Is the food delicious?"

"You can say that." I laugh awkwardly because she's too friendly and beautiful. "Your... face is familiar."

"Uh huh? Yeah, right!" She flipped her hair and wink at me. "I'm a famous food blogger and I'm featuring this restaurant on my next blog, but I'll try it first."

"You will enjoy it." I smile warmly at her.

"Here's your order ma'am." Her waitress come to her and put her food on her table. She ordered quite many. "Enjoy your meal ma'am!"

"Thank you!" The woman blogger dig in right away.

I chuckled at her behavior. I can see she's a nice person. "You love food." I noticed.

She look at me again and smile with food inside her mouth. "Kind of." She laugh and continue eating.

I sip on my water again and just minutes later my food arrived and the waiter put it carefully. I smell the food and jumped when I saw a head of a dead cockroach below the fried rice. "Ahh!" I scream and got everyone's attention.

"Ma'am what's the problem?" The waitress ask me worryingly.

My mouth is open, I look at her with terrified expression. "T-there's a cockroach on my meal!" I shouted because of shock.

"What?" The waitress ask, shocked and terrified too.

Everyone froze in shock and I heard clinging of spoons and fork falling. I look at the waitress with wide scared eyes. She seems to be scared too. I breathe in and out and close my eyes to calm myself.

"M-maybe I'm just mistaken." I said calmly and get the fork and take out the cockroach on the plate so I can see if it's really a cockroach and it really is.

Everyone is silent for seconds and then someone puked on the floor. I see it's the blogger and it is followed by someone, some old lady puked too. The waitress and the waiter attended the ladies while the other customer started to rant and the other's are taking photos.

I'm confused on what to do, a waitress is also talking to me, asking me if I'm alright. The manager also tried to approach me but the other customers rant at him immediately. I shook my head in confusion and I just ran outside because a riot is starting.

"I'll sue this restaurant!"

"I'll report this I'll make sure it won't operate again!"

"Yuck! I ate this kind of meal!"

"Iww!"

"I won't go here anymore!"

"Yuck! We won't pay!"

I go out of the restaurant and look at my back. The commotion is getting bigger and the manager is crowded while the waitress and waiters are trying to calm the customers.

What the hell happened?

I continue walking away while looking at the restaurant's glass wall reason why you can see everything that's happening on the dining hall.

"Good job." A bored voice stop me.

I look at the person who said that and I look at him questioningly. "Are you talking to me?"

"Who else?" He look around. The people around us is too far to hear his bored deep voice. He look at me again and smirk. "That's a good performance right there."

"What are you talking about?" I ask innocently.

He look down, still sporting his evil smirk and then look up at me again. "Let's go. I'm bored." He grab my hand and open the flashy expensive convertible car near us and push me inside the shotgun seat.

I seat belt and lean my head on the backrest. "Where are we going?" I ask when he sit at the driver seat. I look at him.

He pursed his lips and glance at me. "Where do you think?" He smirk and drove off.

When we are at the highway he open the top of the car. I smirk because he already know that I always want it this way so we can enjoy the morning sunrise and the air. I close my eyes and lift my face to the sunlight and feel the air hitting my face, letting my hair fly at my back.

"So, what are you doing here? Did CU changed its address? As far as I can remember it is city away from here."

I open my eyes and look at him. "Why do you care?"

He huffed and chuckled slightly. "I don't care, just wondering."

I smirk and cupped the side of my head using my palm and rest my elbow at the door. "Don't wonder about it. It's none of your concern."

"Well, I like that restaurant and judging by what happened, it won't operate anymore. What did you do?" He ask.

I'm getting impatient and annoyed at his questions. I give him a glare. "I said it's none of your business."

He smirk. "Fine. Damn, you're short tempered. Well, ditch your school for today. I want you in my bed."

I just roll my eyes.

"Ah!" I let a breathy moan as I watch him eat me down there. "Mnn." I bit my lip when he suck me and nip my jewel. "Oh!" I sob and tighten my hold on his hair as he continue lapping my feminity. "Fvck!"

He get up and kiss me on my lips. I tasted myself but I still respond to him and let him lay me on the bed.

"Will I know your name now?" He ask while laying on the bed arrogantly, with both of his arms on the back of his bed and naked, his hips to down is just covered by the white sheets of the bed.

I'm taking my clothes on in front of him when I take a look at him because of his question. He look so gorgeous with his muscles all at the right places and face like adonis. Dangerous and evil type of adonis.

He smirk and give me a wink.

I roll my eyes and continue putting my bra on. "Just text me when you need me." I said.

He chuckled. "Yeah, I will. Maybe next week, I have no lack of girls you know?"

I gave him a dirty look. "Are you bragging about sleeping with different girls? Just don't give me aids or HIV and we're good."

"Tss, look who's talking. Keep yourself clean. I'm still enjoying your tight 'down there'."

I comb my hair and get my pursed. Didn't minding his last words. I am clean if he's clean and I'm enjoying having him too, but he doesn't need to know that. I walk to go.

"Where are you going?" He ask. "We are done? Just that? Quicky?"

I turn to look at him again with bored expression. "We spend 3 hours in sex, isn't it enough?"

"That's just a quicky. Usually we are doing it for the whole day."

I laugh without humor. "Are you getting sentimental now? Do you want to cuddle? Let me remind you mister, we just agreed to be fvck buddies. Don't cross the line."

He laugh so loud and I just give him bored look. "Tss, in your dreams young lady. I'm just wondering about you, don't be assuming now, you're just one of the pile of girls on my phone. You're just kind of intriguing because you don't want to know anything about me."

"I wanna know." I answered honestly. Well, I knew him for 2 years now but still don't know his name. I think he's years older than me, rich, but I really don't know anything. I wonder, but that's all.

He raised a surprised eyebrow. "Really?"

"Yeah. But I like you more on bed so I don't want to risk it. Now if you will excuse me. I still have a few classes remaining." I go out and the last thing I heard is his amused laugh.

In school,

"Where have you been?"

I jumped and look up to see Terron's worried eyes. I just enter the classroom with head bowed down that's why I didn't notice him.

Tall with a lean athletic body, his hair is silky black, and has innocent handsome face. His eyebrows are furrowing in curiosity.

Why is he here?

"I'm looking for you since this morning." He said and I watch his face slowly contorting while watching my face. "What happened to your face?"

I sighed and look down to cover my face using my hair and continue walking to my seat.

"Ennaira I'm talking to you." Terron grab my arm and turn me to face him.

I worriedly glance at the students watching us and look at Terron again. "Terron let me go, it's embarrassing." I beg him.

He let out a frustrated sigh and take me out of the classroom with him.

"Terron!" I called him but he just continue walking with me in his grab.

He stop at the back of the building where no one is staying. It has a lot of unused chairs and other school stuffs, like a storage area.

"Tell me what happened yesterday. Did Cath and her minions hurt you again? What did they do this time? Tell me." He ask in heated anger, just waiting for a trigger to detonate.

"I'm alright. Don't worry about me." I said sadly and look down, afraid that he will see the lie in my eyes.

"Ennaira..." He called my name softly. "You can't continue living like this. Please stop."

Tears pooled at the corner of my eyes and I feel something tugging my heart. "I... it's not that simple." My hands took a hold on my skirt.

"It's simple than you think. Don't let them step on you and they will stop. If you will just fight back, just one fight, they will stop what they are doing to you. The problem here is you. You're letting them do this to you."

I shook at head and bit my lips before looking up at him. "I already did that!" I can't stop myself from raising my voice, because I get what he meant but I really can't do something about it. "But did they stop? No! They didn't! They just got worst!"

"Then let me help you!" He shouted back.

"How?!"

He shut up because of that question.

"You told them to stop! Did they stop? You threaten them! Did they stop? You already did what you can! You can't always protect me because you're always not with me! Yesterday, are you there to stop them?" I can't help shouting in frustration.

"That's because I have a tournament yesterday." He said calmly, sounding so guilty.

"Yes. A proof that you can't protect me all the time. Because almost all of your days in school you have tournaments and meets and when you're here, you're busy at your practice. You're not always with me... so give it up."

"Do you want me to drop the team?" He ask me seriously.

Did he just seriously ask me that?

My tears started to fall and I felt like my heart is slowly breaking. That's on my favor but... "No." Of course not. "That's your passion." I can't afford to took it away from him. "No, don't you ever do that!"

Why is he willing to do that for me? I hate it. I hate this conversation in general.

"Then what? How can I help you?" He ask softly and try to touch me but I refused to be touch and I shook my head.

"Please just let me be and don't stick yourself to me. Please do that for me, as a favor. Leave me alone." I said and walk away from him.

When I'm out of his sight I chuckled. It's so funny, he's so funny. Protect me? It's so ridiculous. I don't need anyone's help, I can do it myself, thank you. Having Terron around me is a very entertaining drama, he thinks I'm a fragile girl who can't help herself and fight the bullies.

It's better if he will stop caring about me. Because in fact, he's just like them. They are just all the same.

I know Terron since grade school but they migrated when we are in high school, when they get back I'm already at this mess. He's trying to help me cope up again but, you know?

There are things that cannot be fixed by just getting back.

My phone rang. I immediately answer it without looking at the caller ID.

"Hello?"

"Enn? Are you at school?"

I froze in hearing my mother's voice. My hands tighten at the cellphone and I lean my back at the nearest wall, gathering strength. "Ma."

"Are you at school?"

"Outside ma, I excused." I lied smoothly. "Why?"

"Run me some errands. It's important. My ex husband will hand it to you later and ask money from your father, I can't give you allowance this month."

"Okay."

"Good, I'll go now."

"Yeah, take care."

The line died and I let out a breath. I look up, asking for some miracle, like... the floor suddenly eat me, or this ceiling drop on me.

Cheating on each other.

Destroying each other.

Trying to outcast one another.

I slowly learn it all as I grow up.

I am the result of everything.

What am I?

I honestly can't figure it out too but I have a very strong and concrete idea.