I was checking my patients' files and writing down notes in my organizer when I heard a commotion just outside my office. I didn't give it much thought until I saw my secretary giddily talking with the other nurses. Well, it’s still office hours and I’m here double checking my files because of that certain secretary who seems to think that throwing your boss your pile of work is how it’s supposed to be.
If I was an anime, you could probably see the veins on my temples throbbing exaggeratedly in annoyance.
"Jen, it's working hours for Pete's sake. I am not paying you to just stand around and chat with the nurses all day." I called her PHS. Through my glass door, I clearly saw how her face grew bitter and how she pouted before answering back,
"I am so sorry, Doc Chavez... BUT! I just can't help it! He's just so hot!"
I literally facepalmed myself and sighed deeply. "Remind me again why I hired you as my assistant, Jen..."
She heard a giggle from the other line followed by a soft sorry,
"Well, Just because I'm your best friend! Hahaha! Anyway, well, Doctor... Your hot and smoking sexy patient just arrived!" suddenly her assistant-slash-best friend looked through her glass door and bit her lips, acting like she was fainting.
"Jen... a patient, ok? Remind yourself, please?" I told her as I quickly fixed my desk plaque.
Katrina Chavez, M.D.
"Oh, he's just so gorgeous! Look at that face, Kat! And that bod... Damn it! And not just that, he's also from a very good family and he is so talented! He has it all--"
"Except for a sane mind." I cut her off and looked at her irately. Why did I ever think that Jen will actually be serious in this job? She's never serious about anything. Never.
"Well, that's what you're here for." Jen smiled before patting my shoulders and leaving me by the door.
I was left standing by the therapy room's door and looking inside, watching my newest patient. I glanced at the file and stared back at the person sitting on the sofa, just staring blankly on the floor.
Draven Reid. 29. Male.
Delusions, hallucinations, social withdrawal, attention deficit, flights of ideas, disorganized behavior...
I suddenly felt my chest tighten that I had to breathe in deep, closing my eyes for a moment, I smiled sweetly and put on my game face. I knocked softly before opening the door, letting him know of my presence gradually.
"Good morning, Mr. Reid--"
I stopped half-way with what I was saying, I was pinned to my spot, with my eyes wide and lips parted as I caught him staring at me. I just couldn't move at that moment. He was looking straight at me so deep as if every look was piercing my very soul.
"E-excuse me?" I asked trying to gain back my composure.
"Red. Call me... Red." he voiced softly, almost as a whisper.
I breathed in deep again, this time trying to steady my breaths that were starting to go faster. My heartbeat was also racing in my chest and I just don't understand what was happening. This man's presence is making me nervous and tense as hell! I'm supposed to be used to dealing with people as a whole, I had patients with all different cases and yet I never felt as nervous, even scared, as to how I feel now. It's just stupid.
"Alright, Mr. Red," I called, my voice slightly shaky.
This time, I had the chance to study him. I do have to agree that yes, Jen was indeed right.
Mr. Draven Reid is undoubtedly beautiful, with his pearly-white skin, a bit disheveled hair, arched brows that complements his deep set of chestnut-colored eyes, his tall nose, and full shaped lips... He was a gorgeous being. He was also oozing with appeal with his toned physique that was still obvious beneath his long-sleeved white sweater. I mean, his gorgeous face doesn't necessarily hide his dark circles around his eyes. And I can visibly see the stubs of his beard that was starting to grow. Some lines in his pretty face that shows stress.
Even with all these, you still would be awed to see him. I guess physically, he does look like he has everything someone can ever ask for... unfortunately, mentally, he didn't have a clear hold of reality.
That's why he needs me.
She sat on the seat opposite him and smiled at him, "I'm Katrina Chavez, and starting today we'll have time to talk with each other. It's not actually that much of a big deal but--"
"Do you think I'm crazy?"
"Am I crazy?"
He asked almost continuously and then he looked at me blankly. Looking at those dark brown orbs were like looking through a black hole, it was dark, deep and empty…
Yet you couldn’t help but get sucked towards it...
I tried my hardest to calm myself and get back on my A-game. I knew I had to do my bid, get this man to see reality as it is again and help him rid of the voices and horrors inside his head.
I need to help him
I need to help him… but before I can do that, I need to know what I’m dealing with. I need to know what I’m actually going to face with this man.
“Why do you ask that, Mr. Red? Is there a reason I should think so?”
He simply snorted, scratched his head and stared straight back at me, long and deep.
“It has to be that or I won’t be sitting here talking with you, right?”
“You were the one who seeks me, I don’t turn down those who come to me to talk… Tell me, is there something you want to talk to me about?”
His face suddenly grew grim and he started rubbing his eyes anxiously. It was pretty obvious to me how this conversation was making him anxious. He is getting anxious about her, about this new setup, about this ‘treatment’.
Though I can’t stop with this. I have to know something about him first. I’m not going to start any treatment or any aid for him just like that, not yet. I need to know him, I need to be able to ‘read’ him, before I can help him.
“You wouldn’t understand… You won’t believe me anyway… I’ve had a lot of people like you try yet no one succeeded. I’m still here, and I’m still drowning…”
He said, this time looking at me with such pain and bitterness that I can’t even begin to imagine. But aside from pain drowning him, there was something else in those beautiful chestnut orbs, something that would be very important for all of these to work.
I can see hope...
There was a small, almost invisible, shade of hope in those eyes. He still hopes, he still believes.
However small it is, I need that. I won’t be able to help him if he does not allow me to... If he does not allow himself to.
“Do you think I’ll be able to save you from drowning? Is that why you’re here, Mr. Red?”
Suddenly, he smiled. A smile so big that started turning into small laughs until it became fits of laughter that was echoing all over the room.
I couldn’t help but just look at him, observe his actions, note his breathing, record the sound of his voice through it all. I then had to place the file on the table and gave him a very small, accepting smile.
It made him stop laughing but he still had that big smile pasted on his face. He was now trying to wipe the tears that started to well in the corners of his eyes from too much laughing.
“I just wonder… If people see what’s in my head, will they be strong enough to swim away? Or will they just drown in my thoughts and die?” He nonchalantly said as he then stared through the window.
“Tell me all your thoughts and I’ll help you swim away for survival, Mr. Red.”
“You better be ready…” I saw him bit his lip and his whole entity was suddenly clouded by a very dark and heavy aura.
“Be sure to breathe in, Doctor. It’s gonna be a deep dive.” he smiled grimly and turned to stare back at me. He looked through me, with those orbs that could wreck all the walls that took years for me to build around myself.
Just those stares are enough for him to feed through my very soul.