I’ll Keep You
Gene Yuan

"Let's break up, Gene."

I was speechless when he uttered his final verdict on our relationship. The cold breeze brought by the December night can't be compared to his cold tone and stern expression. Not that I didn't expect this to happen. When we started dating, my mind was filled with what if's. But he made me trust his words.

He made me believe that there was nothing that I should be afraid of by taking his hand. And for a while now, I have been living an endless pleasant dream. Not until him - the one who brought me in this pleasant dream sent me back to a wretched reality.

I parted my lips to speak but not even a sound would come out, as if there was a big lump in my throat that prevented me from protesting about his unexpected decision. I just stare at him as he keeps shattering me bit by bit with his hateful words.

"This relationship is fruitless. I was too drunk with the idea of falling in love. I got so drunk with love that I forgot what is right and wrong. I was not in my right mind when I asked you to date me. But I'm sane now, so let's stop this." Eros declared, which finally made a hollow laugh escape my lips. That's all I could do after hearing those words that I didn't expect to hear from him.

"You're not in your right mind? So all the words you said and things we did, are they all the product of your insanity? Are you kidding me?" I asked as I tried to hide the anguish I felt with a weak laugh.

Eros remained his cold expression, as he watched me try to process the things he said. I held the tears that wanted to escape my lids but it was harder than I thought. I took several deep breaths and I could tell that any minute now, tears would start falling on their own.

"I won't approve of it. We're not breaking up! You said you love me!" I yelled in frustration that made him finally have a different expression on his face. Embarrassment.

And it hurts like hell. How the affection that I used to see in those lovely orbs turned into contempt.

"Stop acting like a kid, Gene! You know what? Just go home. This talk is over." He angrily said before he turned his back on me to leave. But I stop him.

I stopped him by kneeling on the ground while holding his hands, and tears were streaming from my eyes. I know that people have been looking at us since we met in a place where people come and go, but I don't care. I can't let him end what we have without giving me a proper reason. A reasonable explanation.

We were still happy despite the constant arguments we had lately. Even when my brother caught us, which ended their friendship, he remained by my side. He promised that he would fight for us. He vowed that he wouldn't let go of my hand. Or was everything a lie? Was that also a product of losing his mind due to love intoxication?

"Don't leave me, please," I begged like a child I am, letting my tears do as they pleased, and throwing away the little pride that I have left. "You still love me, right? Don't please. Let's talk this out." I cried out in pain, but even my tears couldn't affect him.

"Gene..." Eros sighed as he pushed away my hand that was holding onto him. He looked at me with contempt as he spoke his real thoughts.

"Loving you and being with you, I truly believe that it was a daydream. But I was wrong. It's a nightmare."

I thought that it was the most hurtful set of words that I would hear from him, but I was wrong. I only cried in pain when he delivered his final blow that sent me to my doom. It feels like a thousand folds of asteroids have fallen to the surface of the earth where I standstill.

"Being with you is stifling. I feel like all my hard work will go to waste because of your existence."

--

Memories of that night when my first love broke me like his promise, flash in my head right when I saw him walking inside the coffee shop that Sean and I picked to take a break after buying the materials we needed for the filming.

How long has it been since I last saw him? After my last attempt to talk with him and he didn't show up, I stopped and disposed of all the things that would make me remember him. I prepared myself for the pain if ever I see him coincidentally like this. But surprisingly, I don't feel the same pain anymore. My heart still races at the sight of him, but that was all, nothing more. It is rather safe to say, that slowly...I'm moving forward.

"Do you know him?" Sean asked, which made me realize that I'd been looking at Eros for a while now.

I nodded and gave him a weak smile, "The person who left me in Cupid's lair."

Sean glanced at the counter to check on Eros before he shifted his back at me. "How did you fall in love with that old man? What did you see on him? That features of his, you will already know that he is a walking red flag.”

I almost choked on my drink when Sean blurted that question and made me laugh hard. I didn't expect him to say that. Eros may be a lot older than us, but he's still in his twenties.

"He was my older brother's best friend," I replied.

"Was?"

"My brother found out about our relationship."

Sean was silent for a moment with his eyes still on me. I couldn't tell what was going on inside his head, but I'm guessing that he is contemplating with himself if he should ask more about me and my past relationship.

"Do you still love him?" His curiosity won over and made me release an amused smile.

I hummed and took a sip at my latte before shifting my gaze back to Eros, who was also looking at us with a serious expression. I didn't look away at him as I gave my answer to Sean's question.

"I do. I do still love that person who abandoned me. But I can say that I'm happier now without him," I uttered with sincerity.

"What if he apologizes and says that he still loves you? Will you take him back?"

I looked at Sean and smiled sadly. "Do you know why Cinderella has to go back when the clock strikes twelve?"

Sean was a bit dumbfounded when I answered his question with another question, but he still responded.

"Because the magic will be undone by that time."

"Exactly. Every dream has come to an end so we can face reality. And loving him was like living in a dream. I've been in a deep slumber for too long, but I've woken up from it now. So even if he tries to woo me with his words..."

I pause for a moment and watch Eros as he leaves the store.

"...his magic won't affect me again.

I turned my gaze back at Sean with a sweet smile on my lips. "I've learned my lesson. I won't be swayed by those overused words that Cupid created to ruin a person's peaceful life. I'd rather hear something different that would make my heart beat irrationally."

Sean just stared at me for a moment before he asked me with amusement in his heterochromatic eyes. "Was that the reason why you didn't want to use the phrase 'I love you' in our film?"

The sides of my eyes creased as I bit my lower lip to stop myself from grinning because of getting caught for the reason why I am not still handing them the altered script for the confession scene of our film.

"I'm still thinking of a better way to express their feelings without using that overrated phrase," I admitted, which made Sean laugh heartily at my childishness.

"Do you want to know words better than I love you?" He asked with his eyes twinkling in glee as they stared at me.

"What?"

He flashed his bright smile and voiced out the words that I didn't expect could make my heart beat erratically.

"I'll keep you."

--

"I'm glad that you choose to be a screenwriter rather than an actor. Your acting sucks." Winter stated, laughing at me after Sean left my room when he got a call from work.

I didn't get to answer his unexpected proposal, thankfully, because of Autumn's call. Without that interruption, I might have blurted yes without hesitation. After all, he's still that person...

The keeper of my heart. My compass. The sun and moon in my world.

"Just admit it, Gene. You're not good at lying. I could even tell that you were about to say Yes to him earlier." Winter teased me, which I couldn't invalidate because he was right.

I just rolled my eyes at him and sighed. "It can't be helped. It's the only way to keep him safe. Not until I found out who wants me dead. I won't stop this act." I said in anger that made Winter heave a sigh upon remembering my situation.

When I first woke up, lying about losing my memory was the first thing that I came up with when I recall the person who walked to see me as I crawled out of my car during the accident. I couldn't see his face, but I remember his words clearly.

"You're a tough one. I already warned you numerous times but you keep defying your fate." I heard him grind his teeth like it's a sort of habit.

"Achlys Sean too. He changed because of you. Why do you keep taking what that person owns?"

I wonder what he meant by that. I tried looking at him but I was too dizzy to look at him properly. What I only remember is the way he smiled. It looked rather familiar.

"Just die, Gene. Stop taking away that person's only happiness." He uttered and stood up straight. "You think you could keep love without defying fate? Even those two who tried to defy fate didn’t get to keep their love."

I still feel shivers in my spine every time I recall his deep voice and menacing smile before he left with blood dripping from his arms. He seemed unaffected even with those wounds he got from colliding his car with me as if he couldn't feel pain at all. The most alarming thing was when they informed me that the driver who crashed his car into mine was dead and has no family. It was cased as drunk driving. And that's what terrified me the most. Because that person could do it again, and the last thing I wanted to happen was to get Achlys Sean involved in this mess. I'd rather hurt him with my lies than let his life be in danger.

"I heard from one of the nurses that someone was there when you had a cardiac arrest. I guess that he came back to finish you off, but what he did only brought you back to life. The CCTV isn't helping at all. He covered himself flawlessly. What I can tell is that he's fit and tall." Winter said, leaving us silent for a short period, thinking of whoever it is that wants me dead and aiming for Achlys Sean.

I would understand if our relationship is out in the open and my identity is disclosed to my love rivals. But aside from our families and friends, none of our workmates and acquaintances knew that Achlys Sean and I were dating. Not that we are embarrassed, but because we both hate unnecessary attention that might take a toll on our relationship. The society we live in is not as welcoming as our friends. Even our families took their time to give us their blessings, especially our parents. And now, this has happened.

Only Winter knew about my deception because he caught me when he visited me once. I still remember how I angrily refuted his claims that he topped me when we got drunk during our college retreat. Of course, it was a lie because nothing happened between us. He even left our room and went off to Kaios and Sean's room to be with his lover.

"If it was Sean who got into this accident, I might have suspected Eros. But you are the target, Gene." Winter's voice stopped me from reminiscing about my first night with Sean.

I sighed and looked at the window, trying to appreciate the stunning sunset in front of me.

"We need to find him, Winter," I declared as I shifted my gaze to him. "So we could start filming the sequel to the movie we filmed for our school festival."

Winter's eyes widened in surprise before the excitement rewrote the expression that reflected his brown orbs.

"Don't tell me you finished it?"

I nodded with a proud smile on my lips. "I finally finished writing the continuation of their story. And before I got into an accident, it's in the process for printing."

Winter punched his fist in the air in glee. "And the title?"

I smiled peacefully and stared back at the majestic view of sunset in front of me. The tangerine-shaded sky sets me back to that time when I heard the three words that Achlys Sean and I use up to this day when we voice out our love for each other.

"I'll keep you."