A stranger's help

Divya's POV.

I am lying on the bed, clenching my bottle green saree to my chest, eyes void of emotions, staring at an infinite space.

Wearing his loose shirt, making me feel as if he is embracing me from behind.

I had no idea at that time, that I will be witnessing such a cursed day in future. I was so happy that day, Kaustubh was my first kiss.

Is there no way on earth to walk back in the past and freeze the time?

Wiping the wetness from the corner of my eyes, I stand up from my bed lifeless, taking the saree I place it back into the cabinets, I tidy up my room getting ready to sleep. It's already eleven in the evening. I grab my purse and while stuffing it back into the cabinet, it slips off my hand falling on the ground, scattering its elements.

I lazily bend down to collect all scattered

articles and stuff it back into the bag. During the process of which I find a card, it's a visiting card, I stare at the white card which says. Doctor Raman, psychologist, city hospital.

Hmm, now that I think about it mom had suggested me to use this new calling service provided by the government for free. It helps people suffering from depression and other psychological problems.

Psychiatrists give free sessions to the people in this scheme.

And, mom knows I am having an avalanche of negative thoughts right now. Only Ani's sweet voice can make me come back to reality. I stare at the card, thinking about should I use this service or no?

Minutes later my hands involuntarily dial the number written on the card, I press my smartphone against my ears as the vibration of the beep travel through my ears.

After a couple of beeps, a manly voice is heard from that end of the call. He says, "Dr Raman, speaking, may I know who this is?"

This voice is making me have a familiar feeling, I don't even know-how Dr Raman looks like but because of some of the other reason, the voice feels extremely familiar.

I don't know if I should be thinking this, thinking about my husband in another man, but the voice feels like that of Kaustubh.

"Excuse me! Am I audible?"

Says the polite tone, I am speechless at this end of the call, staring into neverland, I try searching every possible detail in his voice and try matching it with that of Kaustubh.

My restless eyes, huffing breath, mixed feelings, and jumbled thoughts all are making me emotionally unstable at the movement.

"I guess its a wrong number."

"No, its isn't,"

I say with my shaky voice, in between my sobs, it's only now that I realize tears flowing down my cheeks, making my voice go distorted, and my eyes puffy and red all over again.

I calm down myself for some time, wiping away the wetness from my cheeks I clear my throat and say,

" This is not a wrong number doctor, I had called this number to get some psychological help, hope you are free for some time."

"Yes, Miss...".

" Oh!, its Mrs Shekharan. Divya Shekhar."

I say politely wanting to hear his voice, his voice has bound my ears to the cellphone.

"Yes, Mrs Shekharan, can you please sit at a comfortable place? I guess you are in your home right now, please sit in a relaxing

position."

Now that he says it, I look at myself sitting in a stiff posture, with my straight back and long face. My facial muscles ease at his words, I move towards the bed from the study table and sit on the bed leaning on the backrest.

"Yes doctor, I am in a comfortable place."

I say in a calm tone, more like trying to assure him, as his voice felt worried about me.

Are all psychologists the same? I wonder!

"So Divya is it okay if I call you Divya?

" Yes "

"Hmm, can you please tell me what is troubling your heart?"

He says with the same worried voice that I felt minutes ago!

His voice feels pained, and on the edge, as if he wants to know what comes next, not as a doctor but as a...hmm..a family member?

"I have lost the reason to live," I say in a stern voice,

"Nothing feels good, neither the morning calm sun nor the evening bright moon, every second there are thousands and millions of waves hitting the shore of my heart, I gaze off in infinity and wish to never return,"

I say chuckling "I must sound like a tv drama actress, don't I?"

Tears of self misery again make their way down the hill, amid my silent cry I further mumble "I am at this point of time, where a person feels better to embrace death over life."

I complete my words and am unable to talk further, my silent cry turns more vigilant, hiccups breaking the flow of my words and I am again mumbling the first thing that comes to my mind,

"He cheated...…o...on...me!

He …he ...pr...promised...to never leave me! Right from the first day, I met him I didn't have my eyes for another person! I didn't even

look at a celebrity with those eyes as I looked at him!

He tried to push me away from him, right from day one, but I ignored all his rudeness, embraced his wounds and what have I got in return! His empty promises.

I swage to god, if he comes back again in front of me I will never let go of him!

NEVER, How dare he!

You know what Doctor Raman, they have not found his body yet, It's been one month since he died, but they told me his body must have been eaten by some animals or something, hahaha can you believe it Dr, Raman? How can such a built person such as my husband BE DEAD!"

(Sobs breaking down her voice completely, her pain bringing the best out of her she is unable to tackle her thoughts. Unable to accept the truth even after a month of her husband's death. She has pressed her phone

near her ears and is balling her eyes out, slowly as she crawls down the backrest, sleeping on the bed encircling her arms around his pillow trying to dip herself in his scent.)

" know what doctor? Kaustubh is a trickster, he has done this with me before! I am not lying to you. (She laughs between her painful cries) Even when had embraced me tightly in his arms, when Jay proposed me on our last day of college. I asked him the reason if his actions and guess what! He said he doesn't love me, it's just that Jay is a jerk and I deserve better, he was almost in the verge of locking me in a box, trying to hide me from the outside world, hahaha (sobs heavily).

THEN WHY DID THAT OVERPROTECTIVE JERK LEAVE ME ALONE! ( digging her fingers deeper in his pillow)

Should I announce I will claim myself as someone else property? Ha? Will, he come to

me then! What a nice idea right!

Hello?

Doctor Raman! Can you hear me?

You are a psychologist right! Tell me how should I console my husband! He is not dead, I refuse to believe that. My heart says it hears his heartbeats and guess what its never wrong when it comes to him.

He is just angry with me, wants me to console him like how he used to do whenever I didn't talk to him for even some hours.

We had a small fight that day, so...you see, he will return. I know this."

And if he doesn't, then I shall go to him, within this month.

Cause that jerk can stay without me, but I can't. Not it in this life not ever!

After about half an hour when I come back to my senses I hear the doctor say,

"Mrs Divya please fetch a glass of water near

you and sip it slowly"

I do as he says, after emptying the glass of water, I feel a strange calmness spread across my heart. As if I needed someone to share my inner thoughts with. Share this burden with.

"Are you done with the water?"

"Yes."

"Hm. Don't mind me, but I guess you had suicidal thoughts before, you even attempted to kill yourself once, am I right?"

How?

How did he know!

My eyes go saucer wide at his words! Silence prevails for some time as I am unable to utter any words from my mouth.

"I take your silence as yes Mrs Shekharan."

Says the doc, I whisper an almost inaudible "yes"

"Hmm, Mrs Shekharan,

I think you feel a lot better now, that you have

shared your feelings with me."

"Yes"

"To treat you better, can I know more about you and the relationship you shared with your husband. And let me say this, only if you are comfortable with it!"

I think about how light-hearted I am feeling right now, maybe I should just pour all my feelings out and make Ani as my reason to live.

"Yes doctor, I am ready to reply to you."

"Good, can I know how you met your husband Mrs Shekharan?"

A small soft smile spreads across my lips as soon as thoughts of our first meet fill my brain.

"I was only three years old when I first met Kaustubh. He had recently shifted to Bangalore from Mysore, with his only parent, his mom."

"That looks like a sweet memory, can you

describe what was your feeling then, or was it just like meeting a new friend?"

Feelings?

Now that I think about it, I guess he was special for me from the day I met him.

"I didn't have any specific feelings back then, but now that you are stressing on it, I feel like he had a special place in my heart from the day we met.

He was not a cheerful boy back then, he would sit quietly, didn't speak to anyone, was a loner to be specific.

I still remember him shifting his house the next door, it was mid-winter and I was playing with Shaila the girl next door, she is a year elder than me, Kaustubh's mom used to send him out to play with us so that she can handle the housework.

And guess what from the day we started playing together, I never allowed Shaila to be his wife while playing house house. He used

to never complain, but never choose me either. I wonder what he felt like back then?"

"That's a beautiful beginning of a relationship.

May I ask you Mrs Shekhran, how do you feel remembering these memories of your which you made together?"

"I feel blessed."

"Good! Do you want to let go of this blessing?"

My expressions turn dark the movement I hear those words.

"NO," I say firmly.

"Do you think your husband would want to destroy those memories?"

"Never, as far as I know, he would want yo treasure it and keep it safe in his dairy."

"Now tell me Mrs Shekhran,

Does killing yourself help you preserve those memories of yours?

Or will killing your self destroy those memories from this earth?"

"It will be destroyed."

"Exactly, do you know what keeps a person alive? It's his remembrance. All the great people around the world are still alive in our remembrance, know why?

Cause even a live person is considered dead if is not remembered by people or his family.

Don't you agree?"

He says in the calmest way possible as if a mother is trying to make her child understand the crucks of life.

"Hmm".

I let out a tiny hmm at in his response.

" Then Mrs Divya, can you please stay healthy, so that your husband is alive in your memory?

So that Mr Kaustubh is with you always in your heart and leaves the world with you

when you age and go to heavens to meet him?

Can you do that for your husband!"

I feel so silly for thinking of ending my life as the only option.

Now that doctor puts it this way, I want to live for myself and keep Kaustubh alive with me in my heart.

"Thank you, doctor, for giving me a reason to live."

I say with a pure tiny smile. I took the right decision of calling Doctor Raman.

"I am always with you Mrs Divya, never forget that.

Bye, have a good night."

"Good night doctor."

Is cut the call,

sleep embracing me the next instance,

My eyes feel heavy, and my heart feels light. I fall into a deep slumber embracing the sweet dreams which I lived with Kaustubh. I am

grateful for him being a part of my life.

I love you Kaustubh.

Saying this my mind blocks all other connections, making me feel numb. After a long while, I can sleep so peacefully...

_____________________________________________

Thank you for reading this chapter. Leave your views on Divya's behavior.

Have a great day ahead.

Thank you for your attention.

Due to some contract issues I am not continuing this novel in this platform. please find me on dream.e to find the ending of this amazing story and also some other of my works. thankyou.