My eyes flutter open. It's still dark out. I look over at the clock in the nightstand. 3:45.

Dammit. I sigh and gently sit up making sure I don't disturb Brian, who is in a deep sleep, snoring lightly on his back.

Brushing my hair back with my fingers, I look around the dark room, wishing I could have gotten at least another hour in. I really shouldn't be surprised, I've never slept the whole night. I always wake up in the middle of the night no matter how tired I am.

It's been like that since I was 13. I shake my head trying not to go back to that point in my life. I slide out of the bed and go into the bathroom. Closing the door, I flick the light on to look at myself.

After splashing my face with water, I look into the mirror, thinking about my life. I wonder if my past life was this troubled, this sad. I should be happy, but it's harder than it seems to let go of old problems. It's mainly the reason I work so hard. I hate thinking about my past. I hate thinking about the guy with the nice truck.

The only upside to my life right now is Brian and his kindness, but could I trust him? Maybe I'm just a charity case to him. Clearly, I'm not on his level financially. I probably never will be either.

Breaking up my pity party, I hear a light tap on the door.

"Come in" I sigh, leaning over, resting my arms on the sink.

Brian comes in squinting his eyes from the light "What are you doing up?"

"No reason. I couldn't sleep" I lie.

He walks to be and puts his hands on my hips. He stares at my reflection in the mirror for a moment.

"Why do I feel like you aren't telling me something?

"I'd rather not talk about it." I look at my toes as he rubs his hands over my stomach.

"Okay. Well maybe we can talk about it another time. Come back to bed" He turns to walk out of the bathroom, but stops when he realizes I haven't moved.

"What's wrong?"

"Why am I here, Brian?"

"What do you mean?" He stands in front of me and crosses his arms, his expression more serious than sleepy.

My hands start to shake. I've never been the type to share my feelings. Being vulnerable was not something I liked.

"I mean we've only known each other for going on two days and you invite me to stay here and be yours after 1 night. You should be with a girl who is more on your level, someone who isn't a waitress" I talk fast, forcing it out.

He frowns hard looking down at me. He is pissed. "And you think you aren't on my level? Just because I have money?"

"Yes" I mumble "I just don't understand why you want me"

Arms still crossed, he steps up to me "Amber, why do you think so little of yourself? What voice in your little head is telling you that you aren't good enough?"

I stare at him as I feel my eyes water.

"Answer me, Amber" He orders, frowning.

I'm in no way ready to have this conversation with anyone let alone him but I'm being forced to face my problems.

Brian turns around and takes my face gently in his hands. "Amber, so help me, answer my question" He mumbles yet it doesn't take away from the authority.

A tear falls down my cheek.

"My mama used to tell me I wasn't worth much of anything." I whisper. "What can I say? I believed her. My life reminds me that I'm not worth much. I don't have anything"

"Amber" he lets his hands fall from my face.

"Please don't make me talk about it." I shake my head and wipe my few tears with the back of my hand. I don't want my first night with this man to be all sappy.

"Amber, I want to understand you." His voice isn't demanding anymore. This man is so, ugh. He doesn't know me at all and he already wants me to talk about my deepest secrets.

Brian sits on the edge of the tub then pulls me onto his lap.

"I know all this is so sudden, but I don't think I could have waited for you any longer. Picking you up on the side of the road was the best decision I've made in a long time"

"It sounds like you picked up a hooker" I say as sniff.

Brian laughs as he realizes his choice in words could be a little better. "Yea, it does." He strokes my back in silence.

"Brian, I want to wait a little longer before I start telling you about my past. I want to see if this whole thing is going to work or of its just temporary. You may wake up and realize that you're wasting your time on me. This whole thing is confusing" I mimic his weird hand motion when I say 'thing'

"Okay, whenever you are ready, I'll be ready to listen, but I will never wake up and see you as a waste of time so don't hold your breath waiting for that to happen" He kisses me on my cheek, "Ready to go back to sleep?"

"Yeah, I'm pretty tired" I stand up and stretch taking a last look in the mirror at my pink nose before I flick the light off and return to bed with Brian.

I lay in bed and think of my mama. I love her so much when I know I shouldn't. She's done horrible things and treated me horribly, but I just can't break loose from her. Taking a deep breath, I let my thoughts go and allow myself to fall asleep.

When the sun is shining in the room, I wake up to my phone ringing. I squint my eyes open to look at the caller I.D.

"Good morning, Rian"

I roll over to find Brian not in bed. I peek at the clock. 9:15. I wish I could have slept a little longer.

"Hey, I got your note, where are you staying at?"

"With a friend. Its just for a few days since I'm off from work."

I sit up in the bed and pin the phone between my face and shoulder, smoothing my messy hair out of my face.

"Is this a guy friend?"

"Yes. He is a guy friend. It's not a girl friend" I laugh. I feel like a gossiping teenager.

Rian is the only person I actually know in my apartment building. All the rest of the people are quiet or mean so I just stay clear of them. The first day I moved in she came knocking on my door. Said she noticed that I was young and wondered if I needed someone to hang out with. We have been best friends ever since.

"Well, you know you had that lady kiss when we went clubbing a few months back so I had to ask. But anywho, is he cute? What's his name?" She is so nosey.

"Yes, he is cute and his name is Brian" I giggle. "I met him at the diner and he gave me a ride when Betty broke down on me and offered to get her fixed"

"He sounds like a gentleman" she sounds like she is swooning. "I need a man like him to come to my job" Rian has been working for a debt collection center for a few years and hates it just as much as I hate my job.

"He is, but I don't know, I don't think I'm right for him. He has a lot of money and whatnot" I climb out of bed and make my way to the window to open the curtains.

The warmth of the sun hits my skin and gives me life.

"Well, apparently he doesn't care about your financial status. So stop worrying about it and just have fun. You need it. All you do is work work work and occasionally go out for drinks with your best friend, moi" She laughs but I know she is right.

"Yea, I think I'm just going to enjoy myself and see where is goes,but imma talk to you later, I'm starving"

We say our good byes and I toss the phone on the bed. I wonder where Mr.Stevens is.

I make my way down stares and immediately smell bacon.

When I walk into the kitchen Brian is at the stove flipping pancakes, frowning from concentrating too hard. Hmm, Mr. Stevens cooks.

I sit at the barstool quietly not wanting him to know I'm there. I am swooning over his shirtless body and ability to cook when he speaks, making me jump.

"How long are you going to sit there and not say anything?" he turns around and looks at me then turns back to the stove.

My cheeks warm. He knew I was here the whole time. "How did you know I was sitting here?"

"When you are used to being in a house alone, it's easy to feel someone enter the room." He places 2 strips of bacon on a plate with some pancakes and slide the plate over to me.

"This looks so good." I rub my tummy reassuring it that food is on its way.

"Thank you. I try I try" he smirks at me and takes a seat across from me.

"Did you sleep well?" he says as he sips orange juices.

"Yea, for the most part. I don't usually get a lot of sleep so I've learned to function off at least 4 or 5 hours."

He doesn't say anything.

We finish our breakfast and he puts the plates, forks, and glasses in the dishwasher.

"What's his name?"

I look at him confused. "Who?"

"The wrong guy with the nice truck" He walks up behind me and turns my barstool around so I could face him.

"Kenny"

"What was he like?" He runs his fingers through my hair making me sigh in pleasure.

"He was nice to me even though he eyed other girls sometimes. He would always ditch his friends and take me out to eat when..." I stop knowing what I was gonna say next.

"When what?"

I bite down on my bottom lip hard.

Brian smacks my thigh lighty. "Talk to me"

I hesitate "when my mama was too drunk to remember to buy food for the house"

Brian's face tells me that he is a little angry. Not at me, but my irresponsible mama.

"Kenny protected me, but he would cheat on me sometimes. I was young and naive. He would always tell me that no matter what he would protect me. So I stayed with him and he kept his word." I picked at the draw string on Brian's pajama pants waiting for him to say something.

"So what happened when you guys got here?"

"We spent a week in a motel, eating junk food and watching old movies." I laugh at the memories of us being so happy to be out of Alabama, "Then one day I woke up and he was gone. He left a note that only said 'You're safe now' I sat there and cried for an hour."

I shake my head. "I was so angry at him and heart broken. He just up at left me while I slept. For 3 weeks I was alone. He had paid up the motel room for a month. I guess he was planning on leaving me the day we got to Florida. He just wanted to get me out of Alabama. In a sense, he did save me and I hold on to that as proof that he did love me."

I take a deep breath, closing my eyes, letting go of my sorrow. I feel his hands rubbing my thighs, then he spreads them so he can get closer to me. Brian puts his forehead to mine.

"Amber, I'm not going to leave you or hurt you" That's what they all say.

"I mean it" He continues as if he knows that I don't believe him. I stare at in his eyes for a while before sighing. It's going to take time for me to trust this man, but until then, I might as well relax. There is no denying that I want him just as badly as he wants me so why not just go along for the ride.

Taking initiative, I run my finger through his hair and pull him closer kissing him softly as I taste the saltiness of my own tears.

I've let my guard down for this man. A man I barely know or trust.